Chapter 35
“I’m thrilled to be here,” Rayne said on a soft laugh, “some of the other stops we’ve made go through this intricate ceremony,” she accepted the cup of tea from her, “most of which I still don’t understand.” She sipped the tea. “Then I have a grumpy man to contend with, because he hates all that stuff.”
Kelsey leaned back and nodded. “Well, grumpy men I’m used to,” she motioned toward the window where Gage, Devin, Cooper and Gary stood still talking, “But as far as how most things go, I know less that you.”
Sitting back with the cup cradled between her hands, Rayne studied her. “I can’t believe you,” she shook her head, “Okay, both of us were around shifters our entire lives and didn’t know.” She played with the handle of the cup. “I felt like my parents deceived me, and I felt so betrayed when I found out.”
Kelsey watched the pain flash in her eyes. “I still haven’t decided who to be maddest at; my parents, Gage’s parents, or all of the guys for keeping it from me.”
Giving her a sympathetic look, Rayne ran a finger around the rim of her cup. “After seeing what Noah and the others that the Tomas family have survived, I understand better why my parents didn’t tell me. They wanted me to grow up, feel normal and build a life of my own.” She sighed. “Only I’m not sure what they expected me to think when I woke up one morning as a wolf.” She grimaced, “It wouldn’t have been a good start to my day.”
Kelsey smiled. “Yeah, I still don’t see why my parents never said. They had me here a lot, but I don’t know how I didn’t see the signs.”
Rayne’s eyes sparkled. “Yes, I suppose tigers are out of the ordinary in a normal world.”
“Considering the size of some of these guys when they shift, yeah, they had to do some serious sneaking around.” She sat there, questions running through her head, not sure which to ask.
“Just ask them, Kelsey. I’ll try to answer as best as I can.” Rayne said softly.
Kelsey took a deep breath and exhaled while trying to decide what she wanted to know the most. Closing her eyes, she blew out another breath before looking back at Rayne. “I haven’t been able to bring myself to call Beth, Gage’s mom, just yet, so the only perspective I have on any of this is from the guys.” Rayne rolled her eyes to that, and Kelsey couldn’t help but smirk. “This cycle, heat, or whatever it’s called,” she felt her face redden, “do you…have you…”
Rayne reached over and grasped her hand lightly. “I haven’t been through it myself, yet.” She winced. “But I have talked to others about it.”
Kelsey sighed in relief. “Please tell me what you can.” Rubbing her free hand over her stomach, her shoulders relaxed. “It’s absolutely horrible. I thought I was dying, hot inside, hot outside and my stomach cramping…”
Rayne gave her a sympathetic look. “I hate to say it, but from what I’m told, the feline shifter has it worse than the others.”
“Wonderful.” Kelsey muttered.
“Have you…” Rayne looked down at her hand and then back up at her. “Have you and Gage been together?”
Kelsey shook her head as her cheeks flushed more. “He…” she searched for the right word. “helped me both times it’s happened, but we haven’t had…sex.”
Rayne nodded, with an understanding look on her face. “Well, if it helps, let him.” She leaned forward. “You don’t have to do anything until you’re ready though.”
Sighing, Kelsey played with her cup. “When it happens, I don’t have control of much of anything.”
“I understand that.” Picking up her cup, she sipped it a few times. “Tell Gage where you’re drawing the line,” she paused for a moment. “When your head is clear. I’m sure he’ll do everything he can to make sure nothing else happens.” She shrugged. “He is your mate after all, so his sole objective is your happiness and comfort.”
Closing her eyes, Kelsey scrunched up her face. “That’s part of the problem. What if I’m not sure I want a mate…right now?” She shrugged and looked back at Rayne. “I mean I’ve always had the hots for Gage, but I never saw the happily-ever-after scenario with him.” She cupped her cheeks, knowing they would be flaming red by now. Dropping her hands, she gave Rayne a hesitant look. “I’ve never been with a man, and I don’t want to be forever bound to one I’m not sure about.”
Rayne sat there and looked at her. Kelsey was thrilled that she was actually taking time to think about her answers. “You can have sex without being marked. Tell him, Kelsey, he’ll understand.” She bit her lip for a second. “Okay, his animal isn’t going to get it, but I think he’ll try to understand for you.”
Kelsey leaned forward and rested her head on her arms on the table. “God, I just wanted to come home and see Gage,” She swallowed, “You know, see if there was anything between us and then figure out what direction I want my life to go.” Tipping her head up, she looked over at Rayne. “Then everything happened and changed all at once…” she sat up and brushed her hair back from her face, close to angry tears. “I don’t know how to handle all of this, I just don’t.” Dropping her hands in her lap, she waited for Rayne to speak, hoping she had some magic fix-it-all answer.
Finally, Rayne leaned forward, her arms on the table. “I understand all of that.” She gave her a lopsided smile. “Let me tell you how I was initiated into this world of shifters, clans and far too many alphas.” She gave her a wide-eyed look. “And then you will see how truly lucky you are to have a mate like Gage, who will wait as long as he has for you.”
Kelsey nodded, just knowing that she wasn’t completely alone in all this weirdness made her feel a little bit better.
Rayne started tracing an invisible pattern on the table as she spoke. “My parents sheltered me from everything. I barely knew anyone other than the two of them—and my father’s employer, Tomas senior.” Kelsey felt her eyes go wide, but she didn’t interrupt. “When they were killed suddenly…” she paused and Kelsey knew, without asking, who was responsible for their death, just like her own parents. “Aiden Tomas was sweet and attentive…at first. He held my broken heart in his hands and I thought he was my savior.” She glanced up for a second and took a deep breath, clearly struggling to find all the words. “We ended up engaged. He was my world, or as I realized, he controlled everything in my world.” She waved her hands around. “I won’t go into all the little details, but when I discovered he was a brutal man, I packed and left.” She had a far-off look in her eyes, as if she was remembering as she spoke. “I picked a spot on a map. Drove from Chicago to this deserted campground a few hours past Timmins.” She laughed. “I’d never driven more than twenty minutes in my life, and here I was embarking on a twenty-hour drive.” She grinned. “That was interesting. I don’t suggest doing it alone.”
Kelsey sipped her tea, even though it had cooled, and waited for Rayne to continue.
“So, I bought everything you could possibly need to camp, even though I’d never done anything that barbaric in my pampered life.” She rolled her eyes. “I thought I’d just hide out, examine my world and options, and then pick up the pieces,” she shrugged. “Then I discovered that not only didn’t I know a thing about setting up a tent or roughing it, but that I was trespassing on this extremely scary, anti-social, but potently sexy man’s land.” Kelsey waited while Rayne stared off into space. “I could go on and on, but some other time I’ll share all the entertainment value of the story.” She shrugged. “I was unnaturally attracted to Devin, even though I had just been devastated by another man.” Her cheeks flushed lightly. “I couldn’t keep my hands off him, and the feeling was quite mutual.” Fanning her face, she gave Kelsey a look, one that only another female would understand.
Kelsey got the drift, even in her virginal state.
“Devin marked me as his mate before I was even aware of who he was, that I was his mate, or that I’d be a queen after being mated.” She continued, an exasperated look clear on her face. “Needless to say, I broke. I thought the man was my savior, protecting me from Aiden’s men when they came for me. Then I discover everything and that I’d been deceived by another man.” Kelsey knew her jaw dropped, but she didn’t comment. “I know, right,” Rayne shook her head, a small smile appearing. “I’m clearly not the brightest when it comes to men.” She looked down twisting the wedding band on her finger. “But you know what? Fate knows what she’s doing. I was in lust with a man that was actually my mate, and now, I wouldn’t change any of it. I feel complete in a way I never dreamt possible, and I feel loved and love him with every fiber of my being.” She sighed and then glanced at Kelsey. “But that’s just between you and I, he still thinks he’ll be doing penance until he’s gray for deceiving me.”
Kelsey just sat back, her mind processing everything Rayne had just said. “I guess I am lucky that Gage hasn’t done something before now.”
“They can’t help it, Kelsey, it’s their every instinct to keep their mate safe and close.”
Taking a deep breath, Kelsey looked up at the ceiling. Finally, she looked back at Rayne. “Thank you. That helped.” She laughed and rubbed a hand over her face. “To understand a bit more at least, but I still don’t know what I’m doing.”
Rayne reached over and squeezed her hand. “Start by talking to Gage, while you’re clear-headed.”
Before Kelsey knew what she was doing, Rayne was on her feet and heading for the door. “I’ll get him now. Get it over and done with.”
By the time she could stand, Rayne was outside with the guys.
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