Come to me

Elle couldn’t bring herself to ask any other questions for the rest of their excursion. The certainty with which Daire had answered her unasked question had shocked her, and if she was being truthful it had intimidated her. She didn’t want to think about it anymore, yet another thing not to think about. In the end they visited several stores, and Elle picked up a few odds and ends to make herself more comfortable. A few bath bombs, art supplies, some candy, a bottle of ice wine and most importantly a new journal, nothing spectacular, just a few things to help her feel a bit more normal. Daire had kept her occupied throughout the trip, keeping her engaged in light conversation, making her laugh despite herself, helping her not to get stuck in her head, and she was truly grateful for his company.

He had insisted on driving them home, citing her terrifying driving as his reason, but Elle suspected that he was simply being mindful of her exhaustion. And she was exhausted, while she was glad she had left the house, she was now regretting her decision to not sleep in this morning. It hadn’t taken long for her to fall asleep on the ride back, despite her best intentions she had to admit that Daire was a great driver, and had managed to put her at ease quickly. 

“Lass, we are back.” He whispered, gently placing a hand on her shoulder. Elle jerked awake startled. “Sorry, did no’ mean to startle you, are you alright?”

“I’m fine, I just didn’t expect to pass out like that,” She retorted, slightly disoriented.

“Car rides, who knew that was the antidote to your venom,” He chuckled, “Come on then, I would offer to carry you in, but I donna relish the double ass kicking I’d get for my trouble.” He teased.

“I would absolutely kick your ass twice for the attempt.” She agreed easily, sliding out of her passenger seat. “It’s no wonder no one accepts rides from me, this seat is the worst.” She mused.

“You’re telling me, my arse cheeks will never be the same, I’d sue, but judging by the state of this monstrosity you would be paying me back in baked goods and tears.” He replied, smirking.

“I don’t bake, and I don’t cry, and I’m genuinely surprised you can still feel your ass from all the beatings you must get.” She told him sharply.

“My derriere is as soft and sensitive as newborns, and you’re welcome to test that out at your leisure.” He informed her.

“That is truly a disgusting visual you present, it makes me regret having eyes, thank you for that.” She replied, making a gagging face.

“You’re flirting could use some work, the goal is to not repulse the other person.” He informed her matter- of- factly.

“Ah that would be the goal, if I was trying to flirt with you,” She agreed.

“Are you no’ flirting with me? Well I’ve most definitely been flirting with you.” He told her, as they began walking toward the house. 

“In that case your flirting could use a whole overhaul, this is the worst flirting I’ve ever seen, I’m pretty sure i’ve been picked up with more skill in the 3rd grade.” She retorted easily. 

“What a fabulous little Lothario you went to primary school with then.” He said, smiling.

“He used to eat glue, and erasers,” She told him, “You should look him up, get some tips. I feel like you’re not being clear enough, more obvious you know?” She said sarcastically.

“You use humor like a shield lass, donna get confused, I may play with you, but I see you too,” He told her seriously. “I like you, I think you are incredibly attractive, I want to get to know you better, is that clear enough for you?” He offered.

She stopped dead in her tracks and looked at him, genuinely startled.

“What?” She gasped out. 

“You heard me.” He replied turning to face her now, “I’m a lot of things Elle, but a liar isn’t one.” 

“I…I don’t know what to say….” She stuttered out.

“Donna say anything, nothing was expected, I’m just making my intentions crystal clear Elle,” He told her, “I intend to get to know you, but I’m no’ looking for a friend.” As he spoke he moved closer to her, never taking his eyes off her. Elle felt frozen transfixed, following him with her eyes. He towered over her, close enough to touch, “I see what I want, I go get what I want, I am a simple man.” He whispered, his face mere inches from hers. 

“I…I…” She stuttered, taken aback.

“Think it over,” He told her, softly. “I’m around,” His smile doing little to relieve the tension. After what felt like an eternity to Elle, he took a step back from her before turning to head toward the house again. “It’s cold out here lass, wouldnae want you to catch your death.”  He called to her nonchalantly, as if he hadn’t just unloaded a bomb on Elle moments ago.

It took Elle a few moments to make her brain and body work enough to start walking again, by then he was several feet ahead of her. She was completely at a loss for how to handle this new predicament. Daire was a handsome man, good company, charming even, and Elle could concede he had an intensity about him that she normally would have found very attractive. However at the moment all Elle could muster was confusion. Looking at Daire was at best confusing and at worst…disorienting. She felt like she should feel more than she did, but she simply…didn’t. Elle felt overwhelmed, too many things were happening too quickly, she couldn’t begin to process it all, in the moment she just wanted to go to bed.

Lost in her thoughts Elle walked toward the front door, Daire leaned against the doorframe waiting for her patiently, a smirk on his lips. He didn’t say anything as he held it open for her, allowing her to move past him without any contact. She walked absently into the house, toward the living room heading for the staircase. 

“Elle?” Milo’s warm voice called to her, it sent a shiver down her spine. She turned slowly to look toward the source. “Are you okay?” He asked her gently. Elle looked up at him, feeling her breath catch in her throat. Milo had risen from his seat on his large couch, his concern written plainly on his handsome face. He tilted his head as he looked at her, examining her in a way that was becoming familiar to her. Something snapped inside Elle at that moment, and before she could stop herself a sob tore out of her. 

“I’m not okay,” she whispered, her voice breaking over the words. “I’m so not okay.”  He moved toward her, wrapping her in his strong arms. His warmth enveloping her, she felt her knees give way as he braced her weight against him, she buried her face in his chest, his clean masculine scent surrounding her as he held her firmly. She felt his big hand cupping the back of her head, as she allowed him to hold her closer. 

“Hey, it’s okay, I’ve got you.” He whispered to her soothingly as he held her.She clung to him, sobs wracking her body as she soundlessly cried. “Talk to me, tell me what's happening?” 

“What is this?” Daire asked from behind them, stunned. Milo turned to look at him, still holding a weeping Elle in his arms.

“Where did you take her? What happened?” Milo demanded, “What did you do?”

“I didnae do anything, we had a nice time in town…she was fine…” Daire began, genuinely confused and horrified by the turn of events. “ Elle, what’s wrong?” She shook her head, against Milo’s chest, unable to formulate words. 

“Elle…” Milo began gently, caressing her hair softly.

“What did you two do to her?” Max growled, from the staircase, both men turned to see him striding down the stairs toward them. “You’re alone with her for half a day, and you somehow manage to break her?” 

“I didn’t do anything to her!” Milo retorted, outraged, “He took her somewhere, and brought her back in this state,” he spat out gesturing toward Daire with his head.

“What did you do to her?” Max demanded, turning to face his brother-in-law.

“Me! She was pure barry when I brought her back, neary a hair outta place! Comes in here, and she’s a mess, I donna ken what Milo said to her, but it was no’ me!” Daire proclaimed.

“Well one of you did something!” Max hissed, “You’re both asses, she’s been through enough without the two of you…” 

“They didn’t do anything,” Elle called out, cutting him off. “I’m fine, I’m just having a really rough moment right now, and I don’t need an audience for it.” She pulled away from Milo, who released her reluctantly, furiously wiping at her tear streaked face. “I’m fine,”

“Elle,” Milo began,

“I am fine.” She told him fiercely, “I’m going to bed,” She informed them all, walking firmly toward the stairs refusing to look back at the three men even as she felt their eyes on her back. “I am fine!” She told them again never changing her pace as she ascended the stairs, maybe if I say it enough I'll believe it myself. 

All three of them exchanged confused, concerned looks between them.

“That woman is not fine,” Daire said finally.

“It’s almost as if she’s been attacked,had her underwear stolen, and gotten less than a handful of hours of sleep,” Ute offered, “And been confronted by not one but two interested men…almost.” 

“You are NOT interested in her!” Max all but shrieked, rounding on Daire.

“He stole her knickers?!” Daire exploded, turning to Ute in shock.

“He did what?!” Milo raged, turning to Max.”At what point were you going to tell me this?”

“I mean…never,” Max replied.

“I came on so strong,” Daire groaned, “oh sweet jesus, you lot are the worst cock blockers!” 

“Wait…what did you do?” Milo hissed at him. 

“I didnae push her in the bushes Milo, relax! I just told her I thought she was bonnie…” Daire began holding his hands up.

“You did what?!” Max shot back before Milo could respond, “You ass!” 

“What? She is bonnie…” Daire defended.

“She’s not the issue, you are the issue!” Max growled at him, “You are a…”

“Slut, he’s a slut!” Milo interrupted, raging. “And this isn’t even the point, I don’t even care about your careless attempts at her, you two,” He said gesturing to his mother and brother “should have told me the extent of what happened last night! You said he tossed her apartment, what exactly did he do? All of it, now!”

“Look, she's safe now…” Max began, helplessly.

“What happened?!” Milo interrupted, “Tell me, all of it!” Ute sighed, taking a seat.

“You should have told him last night, Max,” She told her son sternly.

“You shouldn’t have gone to sleep and left this to me!” Max retorted angrily.

“This isn’t a debate over which one of you sucks harder, you both should have said something and neither of you did, now start talking!” Milo told them both. Both Mother and son exchanged a look.

“You heard him, start talking!” Daire hissed, taking a seat. “What happened to that woman?” 

****

Elle felt absolutely embarrassed at her display downstairs. She tossed herself onto the bed, wishing she could sink into the floor and disappear. Two breakdowns in a single day, both times with an audience? Seriously? Elle was not by nature a crier, and certainly never in front of anyone, she honestly had no idea what had come over her. Perhaps it was the concern on Milo’s face, the tone of his voice? The fact that he had asked her at just the exact right moment? Elle had no idea what had triggered her exactly, but she had to admit that being held by him felt…safe. Truth be told if Daire and Max hadn’t interrupted she wasn’t entirely convinced she wouldn’t have stayed there weeping in Milo’s shirt, taking the comfort he so readily offered her. She could still smell his intoxicating scent on her, warm, clean and masculine, familiar…She ran her hand absently over her new hoodie, everything about him felt familiar, and yet completely unknown. 

Elle pulled herself under the covers, she was done for the day. She didn’t want to process her feelings about what had happened to her, about Daire, and definitely not about Milo, and his fantastic hugs. He did give fantastic hugs though…and he smelt so good. Ugh Elle needed a nap. He smelt like lavender, and citrus…and exactly like this damn sweater! Elle all but jumped out of the bed, grabbing at the sweater, pulling it over her head, she turned it around to look at the tag, the size…and hissed. It was a men’s hoodie! Now that she examined it closer she realized it definitely wasn’t new. She groaned, she was absolutely wearing Milo’s god damned hoodie…and she’d been wearing it in front of him! She collapsed back onto the bed wondering if one could die from embarrassment. Why would Ute give her Milo’s fucking sweater?! And more importantly now that she thought about it, why wouldn’t Milo say anything about it?! Probably didn’t want to call her out for being a creep…Elle threw her face into the pillow and shrieked, she had been wearing his clothes all damn day, wept all over him, and let’s not forget crashing at his home…

“I want to die,” She groaned to herself miserably. She had no idea what to do now, should she return the hoodie? I mean obviously I have to return the hoodie…right?  Did she? Ute had given it to her, she had no way of knowing it was Milo’s, he hadn’t said anything…It was soft and warm, and…it smells like him… She had to return it! She had to!

Determined, she got up from the bed and folded the garment, restraining herself from touching it over much, though she did steal a few covert sniffs of his intoxicating scent. She stood with the item in hand, and walked toward her door, she placed her hand on the door knob and then stopped dead, he wasn’t alone downstairs right now, giving him his hoodie back in front of everyone would make this experience so much more humiliating for her. And frankly did she have to give it back to him in person? After all she hadn’t taken it from him, she had been given the thing by Ute…No she would just go and leave it outside his bedroom door, that way she didn’t have to interact with him, yes that was the way to do it! Her mind made up, Elle opened the door and tiptoed carefully toward the master bedroom, or where she assumed it was anyways. Trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. As she walked down the hall past the bathroom, she noticed that there were several doors lining the halls, she groaned, which one was Milo’s room?

Should she open doors? She could hear voices from downstairs, Max and Milo’s for sure, so she knew he wasn’t in his room, but…what if she guessed wrong and walked in on someone? Should she knock? That defeated the point of being inconspicuous… As she debated her next move, she felt a soft hand on her shoulder, she all but screamed as she turned to see who was behind her.

“Sorry Lass! Didnae mean to scare you, “ Maeve said softly, her beautiful mane of hair up in a towel, “What are you up to?”

“I…that is…nothing!” She stammered out, hiding Milo’s hoodie behind her back. “Do you know which room is Milo’s?” She asked as glibly as she could.

“Uh huh, and why are you looking for his room then?” Maeve asked her pointedly.

“I…umm…it's fine, I’ll just umm…I’m going to go take a nap.” Elle retorted, face flaming as she backed away.

“Isn’t your room that way?” Maeve asked softly, pointing in the opposite direction. 

“Right, right you are.” Elle replied easily, making to move past Maeve toward her room.

“What have you got there?” Maeve asked, inclining her head toward Elle’s hand. 

“Oh this, nothing, nothing just an old hoodie…” She managed, her face so hot she felt certain she was a beacon of her own humiliation.

“Is there any particular reason you have Milo’s favorite hoodie, lass?” Maeve asked her, arching her elegant eyebrow. Elle groaned, burying her face in her free hand.

“It is NOT his favorite hoodie! Why can’t I just catch a break!!” She mumbled around her hand. 

“It is his favorite hoodie, I remember because he absolutely ripped it off Max when he borrowed it,” Maeve told her easily. “Well borrowed is a strong word, more like taken to another country without asking, but Milo is very particular about his things.” 

“Then why in God’s name would he not say anything?!” Elle groaned. Maeve giggled despite herself.

“Oh lass,” Maeve began, barely containing herself.

“God damned Ute,” Elle hissed, “She gave me it, not even so much as a warning!”

“If he didnae say anything it must nae bother him you having it,” Maeve reasoned. “Are you trying to return it?” 

“Shouldn’t I return it?” Elle asked her, “This is so weird, he absolutely thinks I’m some weird creep.”

“He does nae think that,” Maeve told her sincerely.

“I think that! For god sakes I’m wearing his clothes!” She said miserably.

“Inadvertently,” Maeve offered.

“I have to return it, it’s too weird!” Elle told her, “Help a girl out, where is his room?”

“What’s the plan then? Throw it at his door and run?” Maeve asked, stifling laughter. “You are being ridiculous, it’s a jumper, not his first born!”

“I can’t keep it,” Elle replied desperately.

“Keep it, he does nae care you have it, t’would be weirder if you left it outside his room like some sort of house elf, doing his washing.” Maeve told her.

“You just said it’s his favorite…” Elle began.

“Aye, and it is interesting that he saw you wearing it and did nae say anything, no?” Maeve said sweetly, “Go have a lie in Elle, you’re being a wee bit ridiculous.” 

“You’re really not going to tell me which room is his are you?” Elle asked, gloomily. 

“Come on Lass, let me make you a tea, put the jumper back on, t’is colder than a witch’s teet in here.” Maeve replied soothingly.

“I am not going downstairs,” Elle told her, holding up her hand. “I’ve made a complete ass of myself twice today…”

“How so?” Maeve asked, cutting her off.

“It doesn’t matter how…I just can't face Daire, Max or Milo right now, and if I see Ute I might just scream.” Elle told her firmly.

“Daire?” Maeve asked, “What happened with Daire?”

“I really, really don’t want to talk about it.” Elle muttered exasperated.

“What did my degenerate brathair do?” Maeve growled, angrily.

“He didn’t do anything, I mean he made a pass at me but…” Elle began,

“He did what?! Ruinnse!” Prick! She hissed, going off in a tirade in what Elle could only assume was gaelic curses. “Can nae think with anything but his todger!” She finished furiously.

“It’s fine, he was probably just playing,” Elle told her, brushing it off. “Come on, which room is Milo’s!” She tried.

“Oh aye, playing, my arse!” She went off on another tirade of swears, this time in what Elle assumed was Dutch. “Couldnae I have had a twin sister? No’ just this street hooker for a sibling!”  

“Bit harsh…” Elle replied, but Maeve wasn’t listening, she had turned and was quickly walking toward the stairway, presumably to speak with her ‘street hooker’ brother. Elle sighed and headed back to her room, she did not want to be part of that conversation, best to do what Maeve had suggested and have a lie in.

****

“You fear for me?!Me?! This is why you will no’ admit what you feel for me.You fear that bastard would do me harm?” He demands furiously, his silvery blue eyes flash.

“Aiden…” She says desperately.

“No! Do no’ Aiden me! Woman you think me so weak as to be felled by the likes of him?!” He roars.

“I..” She tries, desperate for him to understand.

“Enough of this! Do you want me Simrin? ‘Tis no’ a trick question!” He tells her sternly, his eyes blazing.

“It’s not that simple!” She cries, frustrated and heartsick.

“Oh Aye it is! Tis a yes or no question!” He says belligerently, “‘Yes Aiden I want you, or no Aiden I do no’!’ One or the other Simrin!” 

“You are asking me to send you to war!” She yells at him, her voice breaking on a sob.

“I am asking you to be my wife! What I do to protect you is my business!” He growls at her, his face at once fierce and tender.

“Are you daft!?” She shrieks.

“Oh aye I must be daft! Daft to be sitting here playing the fool with you, when I could be outside this keep pummeling the life from Richard’s body! Take the choice right out of your hands!” He tells hers, his hands speared through his thick red hair looking like he wishes to rip it out in his frustration.

“That’s your answer is it?! Kill him and keep me? And what, we marry and before next spring we have the English Army down around our ears!?Brilliant!” She hisses.

“I could slit his throat and bury his lickspittle arse under the latrines where it belongs. Pen a letter to his father that he’s run off to France if you’d prefer,” He tells her now deadly calm. “Except that the useless git is illiterate,” He growls.

“This is pointless Aiden, don’t you understand…” She whispers brokenly, desperate for him to comprehend the danger.

“No it’s you who does nae understand lass. I am Aiden the God damned Ferocious! Fucking bane of the sassenach armies! The MacReith! I’ll unite all of God damned Scotland under my banner and happily sack every English town between here and London for you! He is the 5th son of an earl out of favor with his king! You think too highly of the wastrel!” He tells her, the determined ferocious expression she knows so well across his face. The confidence in which he says it makes her heart ache, she wants to believe so badly.  “And even if he was the fucking prince of England, lass I would still no’ give you up!”

“What…what are you saying?!” She whispers, awed by his burning eyes, unable to believe what he was saying to her, without words.

“I love you, Simrin. I will no’ have another. It’s you! Can you no ken that? If you do no’ want me then fine, go with him.” He tells her, his eyes blazing with unbridled emotion, he frames her face with his big hands.  “But if you fear for me and this is why you stay with him, then lass you fear for nothing! I will be your shield and sword! My life for yours.”

“I am nothing and no one…you can not mean to…”  She whispers, fighting back sobs, desperate for him to understand their predicament. She would spend a thousand years with the likes of her master if it meant he would be safe, if it meant he would live.

“You are everything! God damn it Simrin! You are everything!” He hisses at her. “Look at me lass,” He demands, waiting until she meets his fierce dancing eyes. “I am yours, and you are mine! Do you hear me?” 

“Aiden…” She sobs, tears spilling from her in earnest now.

“Say you want me, say it lass, and nothing will stand between us.” He whispers to her urgently.“I will lay his head at your feet, I will slay any army! Just say it, mo’ Chridhe! Say you want me!” He looks at her with wild desperation now, all the cards before her, her heart hammers in her chest. “You are everything! Is tusa mo chridhe!” He entones, his voice shaking with the force of his conviction. 

“I am your heart?” She whispers, tears flowing down her face, hope flickering within her. “You really love me…”

“Yes, more than I have ever loved before, more than my lands, my duty, more than my life. My heart beats outside my body now Simrin, for it is yours, for this lifetime, and all others.”  

His hand rings out to slap her across the mouth hard. She tastes blood, but does not flinch for she knows better. 

“You will never leave me,” He screams at her “I am the one you should love the best, the one you should love above all else,” He grabs a handful of her hair and yanks her face toward his, she stares into his dead cold deep set green eyes, hating them, disgusted by him. “That scot will die, you will watch him burn, I will burn his home, I will make whores of his mother and sisters, and I will make you watch! You are mine Simrin, your magic is gone now, you are soiled by that animal, but you are mine still! I will place his head on a pike at our bed, and you will love me the way you once loved him!” 

She spits the blood out of her mouth, and looks at him, seeing him for what he truly is, a coward, infuriated she squares her shoulders, meets his eyes, and smiles.

“I will never love you the way I love him, I love him best, I love him above all else, even my own life, and I will love him for this lifetime and all others.” She spits at him, unafraid. “You are nothing.” He screams enraged, drawing his hand back he back hands her, holding her up by her hair, he begins to hit her with all the anger and frustration, and pent up lust he carries for her. She laughs, knowing he is truly powerless, “Kill me! Set me free, I will come back for him, again and again, I will never stop loving him Richard, never!!” 

Finally spent, he throws her to the ground, shaking with rage, his hands are covered in her blood. He gazes at her, breathing hard, his angry mein changes to something else altogether…evil. He smirks at her, his eyes deranged, he reaches for his britches,

“I won’t kill you, but you’ll wish I had, you useless whore.” He whispers to her, as he kneels to the floor, “He can have what’s left of you, once I’m done.”

No! NO! NOO! Not this, please god not this!

Brick against her back, knife against her throat, green eyes become grey….

“Do you think your precious mongrel will want you once I’ve cut your pretty face?” He asks, his face morphing back and forth, a scar one moment the next a beard, young, older, grey hair, chestnut brown in a queue, straight white teeth, a snaggle tooth…he leans down, his breath smelling of tobacco and booze, “I’ll never let you go, you are MINE!”

Laying in her bed, wrapped in her sheets, his eyes shoot open and a slow smile crosses his face…She’s dreaming about me…

Elle jarred awake, screaming.