Come to me

Elle stared out the window as Milo drove, feeling so many confusing and conflicting emotions all at once, sadness, anger, humiliation, regret ,violation, blind fury…She hadn’t said anything to Milo since they’d left her apartment and now that they were back on the highway she felt like she owed him an apology. He had told her not to do this, warned her numerous times that it wasn’t a good idea, but she had been stubborn and bullheaded. She had ruined their day, it was on her now. She had no god damned common sense, of course she would react this way upon seeing the remains of her place. Needing him to rail at her as much as she was railing at herself she turned to him, fixing her gaze on his profile.

“You can say it you know!” She growled at him, he didn’t even react.

“Say what Elle?” He asked her calmly, his tone even and soft. She clenched her teeth, she wanted him to yell at her, she wanted him to tell her what an idiot she was, wanted his voice to match the one in her head.

“That I’m an idiot! That I fucked up! That I wasted an entire day for no fucking reason? That you fucking told me so?!” She demanded, he turned to look at her, taking in her expression. His face was soft, gentle, full of affection. Turning back to the road, he swallowed.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” He said instead. Elle shrieked in fury.

“What are you sorry for? You tried to stop me! I’m…I’m so stupid!” She raged at herself, her voice breaking at the last. He pulled over onto the shoulder. Putting the car in park, and turning on his hazards, he reached across her and undid her seatbelt, wordlessly he pulled her from her seat and into his lap, cradling her against his body. “Stop it! Stop being so… fucking…stop!” She sobbed, impotently pounding her fists against his chest. 

“Shh, it’s okay, it’s all going to be okay.” He told her gently, running his hands up and down her back as he held her. “You didn’t do anything wrong, schatje, you are the one that was wronged, I’m so sorry.” He cupped the back of her head leading her face to his chest, as she bawled into his shirt. 

“I hate….this, I hate this so much!” She roared, her petite delicate body violently shaking. “He destroyed everything!!” 

“I hate this for you, I am so sorry,” He whispered, taking all her grief, all her hurt, offering her comfort and softness, when what she was used to was anger and hardness. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t listen…” She began.

“No, no, don’t be.” He cut her off, tilting her back across his arm so he could look down at her face. “You had no way of knowing it was that bad, and I…I should have been there to stop this from even happening in the first place.”

“We didn’t…we didn’t even do anything to him!” She whimpered, “I…didn’t even know you then! Why…?” 

“I don’t know, I wish I could give you an answer, but I really don’t know.” He whispered against her hair. “The only consolation I have in this, is that my brother was there to protect you, that he didn’t get his hands on you…everything else is just stuff…you are the most precious, important…” He swallowed down his fury and panic. “I will replace everything he destroyed, I will help you rebuild everything, I am so sorry.” Elle felt as if the tower of things she hadn’t allowed herself to think about had tottered over, and now one by one every ugly sad thought she’d had flashed to the forefront. 

She bawled like a baby, feeling all the pain, hurt, and fear she hadn’t allowed herself to since this whole ordeal had happened. Her voice broke on the sound of her anguish, and as if in answer his grip around her tightened. He mumbled soothing, loving things to her, allowing her to feel the full range of her feelings, while still safe in his arms. They stayed there for a long time, as she wept her heartache out, and he held her until she calmed and stilled in his arms, in those moments while her face was pressed against his chest, and she could hear his steady strong heartbeat she thought…This heart is mine, this man is mine, and I am his.

****

He would have known he was in the presence of her lover, even if he hadn’t seen them together with his own eyes. It was repulsive, infuriating, agonizing to feel his specific aura. Like a knife in his brain, he practically reeked of her affection, of her adoration, of HER. He certainly hadn’t needed the visual proof of their casual intimacy, of the way he used his body to shield hers, the way he held her, soothed her, comforted her…shared the very essence of his strength to envelop her. It was so jarring, so aggravating…so disgustingly familiar. He was filled with rage so strong it felt for a moment as if he were no longer in his body, never had he wanted more to attack someone than he did now. But he wasn’t stupid, he could see the swirling darkness in his aura, the ability to take another’s life if need be, he knew a killer when he saw one. This man would rip him limb from limb, with his bare hands before he allowed him access to her, no he had to be more clever than this, he had to plan this. The idea of it made him furious, he was constantly forced to be sneaky, and underhanded, because this was her shield. He makes me have to cheat, lie and steal…just to have what’s mine!

He had known sending Lucia was a gamble, the great Viking Witch was just as likely to kill her as she was to listen to her…what he hadn’t anticipated was that she would take and claim Lucia! At first he hadn’t though she mattered that much to him, maybe even that he resented how obsessed with her he’d grown. He’d maybe even hoped the Viking would end her life for him…free him from her. That’s what he’d thought he wanted, until he’d been faced with the reality of the situation. Until he’d been faced with her death…When she hadn’t returned, hadn’t sent word he’d been sure she’d been killed, and he’d nearly lost his mind. Destroying everything in his path, unable to sleep, eat, concentrate…it was disgusting how much he actually cared about that little slave…

And now here she is, in plain sight, wearing that viking bitch’s sigil on her exposed flesh?! He strides toward her before he even consciously makes the decision to do so, reaching out to grab her. A complicated mix of emotions, the strongest of which is possessive rage, clouds his judgement for just a second. The second that might have warned him about what’s to come…the very moment his hand is about to lock around her arm to yank her to him, it's as if she materializes between them, smashing his hand away with a powerful forearm. Never has he seen a woman move so unnervingly fast. He stares up at her hooded face, and sees malice and fury, though he can not see her features clearly.

“Are you blind, or just stupid?” She demands, “She wears the sigil of the shield-breaker, and yet you dare to touch her?”  He snarls at her, even as he takes a step back. It’s not like him to fear a mere woman, but this is not just any woman. He can feel the inherent threat roiling from her powerful body, knows he is standing before a shield-maiden, but still…he has no intention of letting this woman keep him from Lucia.

“This is my property,” He retorts, inclining his head toward a trembling Lucia. He’s not sure what he expects, but when she ducks further behind the shield-maiden…fury, hot and white blazes through him. “Lucia! Tell her whom you belong to!” He spits, she whimpers, the shield-maiden moves to fully block her from his view, looming over him. 

“She belongs to me, she bears my sigil, she is mine.” The woman says simply.

“She bears my brand upon her!” He lies furiously, and the woman smirks at him coldly.

“She bears no brand upon any part of her body, believe me…I’ve looked. So you must be mistaken.” She tells him, bile and rage rises in him, this woman has seen her in her full flesh! The woman leans closer to him, so close, her face inches from his, “If you’d dared to mark what was mine, you would not be alive to tell of it. The witchling belongs to me, let it lie, you do not wish to challenge me.”

“Do you know who I am?” He roars, and she grabs her hood from her head, yanking it down to smirk cruelly at him.

“Do you know who I AM?” She rejoins, and his skin crawls as he stares up into her violet eyes. 

“Viking witch…” He hisses, staring in stunned disbelief to be face to face with the single most beautiful and terrifying woman he’d ever seen in his life. Her visage is near perfection, even as her unusual eyes blaze with the knowing one only receives from taking lives, fearless and cold. The woman he’d thought had killed his most prized possession. “What do you want with Lucia?” 

“That’s my business.” She says harshly. The audacity of that statement infuriates him, everything about Lucia is his business! He owns her, every part of her, down to her very soul!

“You know full well she belongs to me!” He growls, and again she gives him that cruel, smug smirk.

“Then come get her, see what happens.” She offers with silky menace, sliding the fabric of her cloak back so he can see the massive axe on her side. “She is no longer property, she is mine, and under my protection.” 

“She was purchased, housed, and fed by me for ten years, she owes me a debt, until that is repaid she can not be freed!” He spits, this is custom, law, the way of things, and this bitch has the insolence to try and force her will upon him?! 

“And in that time she contributed nothing to you or your household? Nothing to offset the cost of your…stellar care?” The shield-maiden asks pointedly, “Sounds like she was an awful slave, and you are well rid of her, then. Nevertheless, if it’s money you want to settle your claim on her, then you shall have what you ask for. Name your price, and be gone.” 

“Astrid…” Lucia whispers plaintively. The woman never looks at her, but her whole being seems to tense at the sound of Lucia’s voice, her face becoming so unfathomably soft for just a second. 

“Do not say what you are going to say, witchling.” She warns her, “You know how I hate to quarrel with you.” 

“...I’m not worth this…” She mumbles, and the shield-maiden’s face clenches in frustration, before she schools her expression. For just a moment he is sure she looked aggrieved and hurt. With horror he realizes that this woman…loves Lucia, that she has carnal knowledge of her!

“Name your price, flesh peddler!” She hisses at him, aggravated.

“She’s not for sale!” He shoots back, “And therefore there is no price for her, return her to me, or I will take her with force!”

“If you don’t want money, then you can bleed.” She replies, tilting her face as she takes him in, disgusted. “She’s not yours, she never was. She was always mine, and you have abused, and damaged her for far too long, you owe me a debt. A debt you’ll pay with blood if you try to take her from me. I give you an oath, that if you take Lucia the witchling from me, you will pray for death long before I give it, I will grind your bones into dust, I will wipe not only you but your very bloodline from this earth, your name will live only to serve as a warning to other of what happens to those who cross Astrid Shield-breaker! Tell me do you want her this badly? As badly as I do?” 

“You would kill for her…this…this…?!” He roars, unable to fathom why this woman would do something so stupid as to make an enemy of him.

“For Lucia, I would do this and more.” She says easily, staring into his eyes with raw determination, and challenge. Daring him to force her hand, daring him to incur her wrath…

And he had…Unconsciously he ran a hand over his throat, the first of a thousand such injuries she inflicted on him as punishment. It had taken her years to exact her vengeance on him…but what difference did it really make in the end? I took her from you that lifetime, I destroyed her and you...underhanded, sneaky, nasty though it was…neither of us got her that lifetime, but the way it broke you! He froze as it occurred to him, it had broken Astrid to lose Lucia especially the way it had happened, the way she was forced to watch…A cruel idea began to formulate in his mind, a new plan, an even more horrific way to get the revenge he so badly craved. He’ll always protect her, always seek to put himself in harm's way over her and she will always think she is not worth his sacrifice…yes…both of them are so willing to sacrifice themselves for the other…For now he would lay low, take his time, plan his next move, use all his formidable intelligence, his ruthlessness, his cunning and…You’ll wish I had simply stopped at taking what was mine…

****

“What do you need right now?” Milo asked her softly, watching her as she lay curled against him in their bed. She shot her eyes up to him and shrugged feeling sad and emotionally exhausted. 

“If I was…alone, I would probably make some ramen noodles, watch some anime…ugly cry for a while,” She told him truthfully.

“Okay, so let’s do that,” He readily agreed, “I’ll take care of the ramen noodles, and you find an anime to watch.”

“Really?” She asked him, tilting her face to look at him, “I feel…like such a weepy…”

“Stop right there,” He told her fiercely, “There will be no putting yourself down. Let me take care of you,” She smiled despite herself.

“Fine, but there’s only one anime to watch when you're sad,” She told him seriously. 

“Full metal alchemist,” he answered, she arched an eyebrow at that. “What? Tragic story of two brothers trying to bring their mother back from the dead, and then failing roundly, resulting in the younger one losing his body, how is that not your go to sad anime?!” He demanded.

“Because I’ve watched ‘Attack on Titan’?” She retorted. “The whole world is overrun by giant flesh eating zombies, but oh wait there’s a whole dark secret to their origin, out in a cellar? Also don’t get attached to anyone because…you know death,constant mindless death? Get your shit together baby!” 

“Everyone and their grandma is a fucking titan, but okay I guess its sort of sad.” He sighed, holding his hands up in surrender. “Oh no…Eren is being a useless whiny bitch who can’t control his powers, every.Single.Episode!” He rolled his eyes.

“Well when you're sad we can watch Full metal Alchemist, on my sad day we are watching Attack on Titan!” She hissed at him.

“Fine, fine,” He groaned dramatically, planting a kiss on her forehead, “Laptop’s on the couch, I’ll be back with ramen, do you want anything else?”

“Ice Cream and candy please,” She told him. He looked at her drolly.

“Do I look like a stupid man?” He asked, arching an eyebrow at her. “Obviously no sad day is complete without sweets, come on now, give me some credit!” Tilting her face up to his he brushed a quick sweet kiss to her lips, “I’ll be right back,” 

“Make sure you get some Canadian mutiny wine gums,” She called out as he headed to the door.

“War crime wine gums,” He corrected over his shoulder, as he walked out. Elle laughed at that, already feeling a little brighter. He just…makes everything so much better, ugh I adore this guy…

****

Elle ventured down to the kitchen, having decided she would make glitter matcha for the both of them, feeling honestly much more upbeat about the state of things. All my shit may be destroyed but…I’m not alone, I’ve got this incredible man, my cat, I’m okay, genuinely things could be much worse.  As she approached the kitchen door she heard angry arguing, her hand froze on the door, as she decided what to do. She stopped dead when she heard her name, listening now.

“...I don’t fucking understand why none of you seem to give a fuck about what’s happening here!?” Naomi raged, “She’s a bitch!”

“Naomi! Stop your shit!” Max hissed at her, “Milo is a grown fucking man, and she’s his girlfriend! You need to get your head out of your ass…”

“She’s a gold digging whore!” Naomi screamed, Elle flinched. “She doesn’t love him, she is using him! And all of you are watching it happen and you aren’t saying or doing anything about it!” 

“You don’t even know her! You won’t give her a chance, she is not like that!” Max roared, Elle pressed a trembling hand to her mouth, feeling sick. 

“I’m surprised she hasn’t given him an infection! They’ve known each other for like five minutes and they fuck constantly, how do you know she isn’t trying to get pregnant?!” Naomi roared at her brother, Elle had heard enough, she felt like she’d been struck, she turned to head back to the room, her hands shaking. Tears formed in the corner of her eyes. She felt like that was enough bullshit for one day. As she looked up all the air left her lungs as she saw Milo standing behind her, his jaw set fury lining his face. 

“Don’t…” She began, but he wasn’t listening, he placed the bag in his hand down, and grasped her hand in his, dragging her with him into the kitchen, his body was vibrating in rage. Elle’s hands shook from reaction, he caressed the outside of it with his thumb absently, as if to sooth her.

As they walked into the kitchen, Max, Maeve and Naomi looked up abruptly, silence filled the room. Milo turned his attention to his sister, a muscle working in his jaw.

“Go upstairs, pack your bags,” He told Naomi, his tone deadly calm, “I’ll book you a ticket back to the Netherlands, you will leave today, you will delete my number from your phone, you won’t call me again, until you’ve apologized to Elle, and if, and this is a huge, massive if, she forgives you, maybe then we can work on repairing what you destroyed today,” 

Naomi looked as if he had slapped her, tears formed in her eyes, as she gaped at him.

“You…you're kicking me out of our house?” She whimpered.

“Our house,” he corrected, indicating to Elle and himself, “You are leaving today, right now, go.” 

“Over some…” She hissed, gasping in breaths.

“Over the woman I fucking love Naomi,” He growled at his sister, “Over the woman who has done absolutely nothing to hurt you, has actually interceded on your behalf,”

“She’s…I’m your sister!” She cried, tears falling down her face.

“Half sister,” he amended brutally, she physically recoiled from his words. “I am so disappointed in you, I thought so much more and better of you Naomi, and you proved me wrong. All I did was talk you up to Elle, I kept telling her what an amazing person you are, and this…” He gestured to her, “is how you present yourself to her? My girlfriend had more respect for me than you did, you don’t think she could have verbally ripped you to shreds? She is brilliant, witty, so clever, she could have savaged you at any point, but out of respect for me, she kept her mouth shut, and you used her like a punching bag. You disrespectful, rude, mean spirited brat.”  

“I…can’t believe you would say this…” Naomi was openly weeping now, looking like she was choking.

“I want to yell at you, I want to rage at you, but I’m not going to do that,” He told her evenly, his eyes ice cold. “I want you to hear every single thing I’m saying clearly, I want you to understand exactly what you’ve done here, because you, not Elle, not me, YOU did this. You ruined our relationship, you disrespected the first and only woman I have ever loved, in the fucking house I built for her, you called MY woman a whore, a gold digger, YOU did that. And if you were anyone else Naomi, I would have physically thrown you out of here, go pack your things, don’t even look at me, don’t talk to me, don’t come near me, until you’ve apologized to Elle.” 

 With that he turned, taking Elle with him and marched out of the kitchen, not so much as looking back.  Glancing over her shoulder as they left, Elle saw Naomi crumble to the floor into a heap, scream-crying into her shaking hands, absolutely inconsolable, as both Max and Maeve stared after them in shock. Oh no…what did I do….

Milo didn’t say anything, heaving in angry breaths as he picked up the bag he had deposited by the door, and led them upstairs to their room. Elle stared at him, stunned, unsure of what to say or do. She could hear Naomi’s sobs from the kitchen, still as they ascended the stairs. 

As soon as they walked into their bedroom, and Milo shut the door, Elle whirled on him her eyes panicked.

“You have to go fix this!” She hissed at the same time as he opened his mouth to say something to her.

“There is no fixing this,” he whispered, catching her face in his hands, “I am so…”

“No! No! You have to go talk to her! I can’t be the reason you cut your sister off!” She blurted, pulling out of his grasp. 

“You’re not,” He told her sternly, “She’s the reason, she disrespected both of us Elle, you didn’t do anything wrong here,”  

“I am not worth this,” She gasped out, shaking. “I am not worth you never speaking to your sister…” He cut her words off with his mouth, kissing her hard and harsh. Her head shot back with the force of his kiss, and he caught it with his hand. She felt his teeth against her lips, grating her, as he dominated her with his mouth, his tongue against hers aggressive. 

“Stop,” He hissed against her lips, his eyes flashing open as he glared at her. “I’m not debating this with you, you don’t get to decide what I think you’re worth, you don’t get to decide what I do with the people in my life who treat you in anyway that I don’t deem appropriate, you don’t get to make those decisions for me,” He wrapped his hands around her face, tilting her head so that she was staring directly into his eyes. She had never seen this expression on his face before. He pulled back from her, never breaking eye contact, “Breath schatje, you aren’t going to win this one with me.”

“I…” She closed her eyes trying to figure out what to say. “This is…”

“It is done,” He told her gently, “And it’s not your fault, Elle…schatje I need you to let this go for me, just…” He sighed looking exhausted. Elle did the only thing she could think to do in the moment, and wrapped her arms around his neck, and pulled him close. He responded instantly, dragging her tighter against him, burying his face in the spot between her neck and shoulder, she cupped the back of his head to her. He exhaled hard, sounding broken. “I can’t…can’t believe I had to do that,” He managed after a moment, his voice shaking. 

“I’m so sorry baby,” She whispered, he pulled her against him harder, his arms around her back like a vise. “I didn’t want it to come to this…I…wasn’t going to tell you…”

“No,” His face shot up, he cupped her cheek gently. “You have to tell me these sorts of things, you can’t keep things like this from me. You can’t lie to me to protect me, to make me happy. It’s disingenuous and it will kill our relationship. There is no lie you can tell me that I would prefer over the truth, and I need you to promise me that!”  Sucking in a breath, Elle dropped her face into her hands as she considered.

“Okay, you are right,” She mumbled, taking a seat on the couch not looking at him, “Which is why…you're not going to be very happy with me right now,” He sat down beside her, turning to look at her, patiently waiting. “Naomi…barged in here this morning, she was looking for you, she was…furious, and she threw a vase…” Milo jolted up from the couch, both fists clenched.

“She threw a vase at you?!” He demanded, shaking with impotent fury. 

“At the wall…” Elle muttered, dropping her face into her hands he made a furious sound in his chest, as he knelt before her, dragging her hands away from her face.

“When were you going to tell me about this?” He growled at her, teeth clenched. Elle tried to glance away from him, but he was not having it, catching her face in one of his big hands, he forced her gaze back on him. “Elle…” he grated.

“Never, okay, I was never going to tell you!” She intoned, her jaw set. “I don’t…want to be the reason you stop speaking to your favorite sibling.”

“Dit is fucking schandelijk,”This is fucking disgraceful, He muttered through clenched teeth, grasping his temple in his hand. “Elle, you can never keep something like this from me again!” 

“I’m sorry, I just…” She began, he looked up at her, his expression raw. He inhaled and exhaled for calm, not saying anything for a long moment.

“I know, I understand,” He told her gently, “You didn’t do anything wrong here, you didn’t deserve this, and I am so sorry.” He blew a frustrated breath out. “You do realize we are watching Full metal alchemist now right? I’m usurpring your sad day,” She laughed sadly at that, clasping his face in her hands.

**** 

Not long after they had started watching his anime, and eating the Ramen, which was decidedly fancier than what Elle had meant, being that he had gone to an actual Ramen restaurant instead of buying the cheap noodle packs that Elle normally feasted on for her sad days, they heard a knock on the door. Sighing Milo, stood to go answer it. Max leaned against the door jam looking at his twin.

“If you’ve come to give me grief…” Milo began defensively.

“No, I haven’t, you were one hundred percent correct to send her home,” Max interrupted. “I just…wanted to see if you’d had a chance to book her ticket so I can drive her to the airport.”

“No, not yet,” Milo retorted, taken aback. 

“Are you both…alright?” Max asked, looking as tired as Milo felt. 

“Yeah I think we’ve both had better days,” Milo sighed. “How…is she?” 

“Refusing to speak with any of us, crying, throwing a full on tantrum,” Max sighed. 

“What does moer have to say about it?” Milo asked, arching an eyebrow.

“What can she say?” Max asked shrugging, “You know how she is with the girls, I called Julian and Fiore, they said Naomi can stay with them once she gets home so she’s not alone at moer’s”

“I’m sure Fiore is thrilled with me,” Milo sighed.

“Actually, Fiore is…proud of you,” Max told him, smirking. “You and I both know Julian would have lost his ever loving mind on Naomi if she pulled that stunt with Fiore, and I would have thrown her physically out if she said anything approximating what she said about Elle to Maeve, the less said about James’ reaction…the point being she should have known better, and you handled that situation properly.”

“Thank you,” Milo muttered, “I appreciate that, I feel like shit about it.”

“You shouldn’t, it was disrespectful as fuck,” Max conceded, “And she’s been a bitch to Elle for days before, so it wasn’t like it was a one off, let me know when you’ve booked the ticket and I’ll get her out of here, Julian can pick her up in the Netherlands.” Milo nodded.  

“You good Elle?” Max called to her, from around Milo’s shoulder, she smiled weakly at him and waved her fingers at him. “Make sure you book her a ticket in coach, spoiled brats don’t get first class or private jets.” Max told Milo, before leaving. 

Milo sat at the edge of the bed for a moment after, just staring at the door, contemplating.

“Are…you sure you don’t want to go talk to her?” Elle offered, coming up behind him on the bed, and wrapped her arms around him, placing her chin on his shoulder. He turned to kiss her face, shaking his head no. 

“I have nothing to say to her,” He told Elle, cupping the side of her head and pressing his forehead to hers. “She knows what she has to do to speak with me again.” 

“Apologize to the gold digging, pregnancy trapping, disease ridden whore,” Elle offered cheerfully, he groaned trying not to laugh. 

“That’s not funny…why is it kind of funny?” He demanded, turning to her, capturing her face in his hands, pulling her in for a kiss. She threaded her fingers into his hair, holding him to her as they kissed.

“Because,” She said in between kisses, “If anyone out of the two of us is a pregnancy trapping whore…” She let the sentence trail and he started groan-laughing, against her lips.

****

“I’m…not interested in a relationship,” she mumbles, unable to maintain eye contact with him, his dark soulful eyes are much too intense for her to maintain the lie.

“Hmmm,” He intones, a trace of amusement in his voice. “I suppose you have your reasons, do tell?”  he encourages, she shoots her eyes up to him, and sees his indulgent smirk.

“I…I’m being serious,” She hisses.

“I’m sure you are,” He agrees, still watching her with dancing eyes.

“I’m 4 years older than you!” She tells him, and he nods. “I’m…a single mother! I have to co-parent with my ex, I…I work full time, and…I go to PTA meetings and football practices on the weekends!” 

“I’m well aware of your situation,” He retorts arching an eyebrow, “You are just stating things about you, I’m not really hearing your objection to dating me,” 

“I…can’t date you,” She says firmly.

“Because?” He asks, tilting his head, placing his chin on his hand.

“I…told you,” She replies confused.

“Because you're 4 years older than me, you have children, a job and have obligations?” He offers, looking at her like she’s insane. “None of these are reasons not to date me,” 

“They are reasons not to date ME!” She snaps.

“Ah, I see,” He says nodding, “Because naturally as a fully grown man, I can’t be trusted to make my own decisions on whom I would like to date?”

“Gabe…” She begins.

“Lauda,” He sighs, “You are not going to believe me if I tell you that none of those things bother or concern me are you?” 

“How…can they not?” She demands.

“I like you, I think there’s something really remarkable and special about you,” He shrugs, “How does having kids, or being older than me, or working to support yourself, or being a good parent, change that?” 

“I…there are so many reasons we can’t date!” she hisses at him, face flaming.

“Sure, and there’s one really good one for us to date,” He tells her.

“What?” She demands.

“We are attracted to each other,” He retorts sweetly, smirking at her, daring her to deny it. 

“Maybe…maybe I’m not ready for a relationship,” She mumbles. His eyes narrow for a second as he processes what she’s said. 

“Okay,” He says finally, looking away, scrubbing his hand over his mouth. “So then don’t date me, but we can be friends can’t we?” 

“Friends?” She says arching both brows.

“Friends, go to the movies, talk on the phone, go for walks…friends.” He repeats.

“Just…friends?” She asks, apprehensively.

“Just friends, if that’s all you want,” He says, simply. Tilting his head as if to analyze her.

“So…now you want to be friends?” She reiterates.  He smiles, exposing his perfect teeth and dimples, his dirty blond hair gleams in the setting sunlight.

“No Lauda, I don’t want to be friends,” He tells her truthfully, laughingly, “But, having you in my life is better than not having you in my life.”

“Gabriel, this is…” She tries.

“Ugh, no one calls me Gabriel unless they are about to tell me something shitty, and you know what I’m not interested in hearing it, not from you, never from you.” He cuts her off, scrunching his face, “You can’t reasonably say there’s any good reason not to be friends with me, I’m a really good friend.”

“Didn’t you just say we are attracted to each other?” She growls at him.

“Are you admitting you’re attracted to me?” He asks her, placing both fists under his chin, widening his eyes dramatically, smirking at her.

“No…” She mumbles, realizing she walked right into that trap.

“Liar,” He teases, “Look, you don’t want a relationship right now, I understand that, maybe you won’t ever want a relationship I can accept that, but what I can’t accept is never seeing you again, never talking to you again, never…being in your presence again.”

“Why?” She asks genuinely bemused. He frowns as he looks at her.

“Because Lauda, I…can’t get you out of my head, I can’t shake this feeling like…we are supposed to be in each other's lives, and it’s so nagging, and loud and frequent…” He manages, as if he himself can not put into words the complexity of what he’s feeling. She feels a chill down her spine as she realizes how right he is, that he is telling her something she knows.

“Like…we’ve known each other…before,” She mutters under her breath. His eyes shoot up, piercing hers. “Like…we’ve been here before…”

“And we will be here again,” He adds. Gabe stares at Lauda for long moments, searching her face, without warning he frames her face in his big hands, tugging her toward him, his lips almost touching hers, his eyes blazing into hers, Lauda’s eyes widen surprised, but…not afraid, never afraid… a single clear thought in her head as she looks at him…MINE…

****

Elle woke and turned to Milo, shaking him awake. His eyes flew open as he turned to her.

“What…?!” He demanded, alarmed, “What’s happening?”

“Gabe was just going to be fine being friends with Lauda?!” She hissed. He blinked several times trying to process what she was saying.

“Lauda…and Gabriel?” He asked voice sleep roughened, scrunching his face trying to think, still half asleep.

“Yes! Lauda and Gabriel, who only got called ‘Gabriel’ when he was about to hear something shitty!” She hissed at him, “Friends?!”

“No…no they definitely weren’t friends,” he laughed, rubbing his eyes with his left hand.

“Then…” She demanded.

“Schatje, He…I just said that to get close to you,” He told her, “I would have said anything to have you, then, now, forever.” 

“So…Gabe…you lied?” She asked, narrowing her eyes.

“No, he…I would have settled for friendship,” He rejoined tiredly, yawning. “I mean having you in my life…”

“Is better than not having me at all,” She finished glowering at him. 

“Arguably being woken up at 3 in the morning, not so ideal,” He told her drolly, “But for the most part, yes.” 

“Would you…this you, Milo you…have been okay just being my friend?” She asked softly, skating over his comment. He frowned as he looked at her tilting his head.

“Would you?” He asked her, arching an eyebrow.

“No,” She retorted quickly, no hesitation. “I can’t just be your friend, I couldn’t have even at first, we were always going to end up right here.” She said thoughtfully, tapping her fingers together as she considered. “You are my soulmate,” She muttered under her breath, that woke him up fully, turning to her he caught her face in his hands and pulled her toward him.

“Say that again!” He growled, his eyes blazing inches from hers.

“You are my soulmate,” She repeated, locking eyes with him. A slow wild smile crossed his face, joy emanating from him, as he kissed her fiercely. 

“Now that was worth being woken up at 3 am for!” He declared.

****

Elle woke up before Milo, and decided to let him sleep in, feeling bad for having woken him up in the middle of the night, but also…she needed to go speak with Naomi. Milo hadn’t booked her a flight home until this evening, so with any luck Elle might be able to actually do some good. As she quietly dressed she contemplated what she was going to say. She knew she probably shouldn’t be meddling in his family affairs but she would be damned if she was the reason that this man had to give up anything to be with her.  My soulmate is not sacrificing his favorite sister for me! 

On her way out of the room, she paused by the bed to look at his sleep relaxed face, feeling a pang in her chest for how much this beautiful man meant to her. Softly she swept a kiss to his forehead as she brushed his hair from his face. I…love you. She thought with blinding clarity, and then instantly felt her chest constrict. Okay not ready to dwell on that.  And then she was out the door, leaving him and their cat sleeping in peace.

She headed down to the kitchen. I need some courage-caffeine. Pushing her messy hair out of her face as she walked into the kitchen, still unsure of how to handle her Naomi situation, she looked up to see her problem sitting prettily at the counter holding a mug staring off into space red eyed. Groaning internally, Elle mustered up her courage, and stepped fully in.

“Hi,” Elle said, gritting her teeth, steeling herself for the reaction. Naomi turned around eyes wide.

“What…the fuck,” She hissed.

“Yeah,” Elle agreed. “It’s your favorite whore,” she sighed, waving at her with her fingers. The corner of Naomi’s lips tweaked before she caught herself. 

“What do you want?” Naomi glowered at her, looking away.

“Caffeine…mostly,” Elle retorted, walking past her to grab a mug. 

“There’s no coffee…” Naomi began.

“Matcha,” Elle told her, holding up the bag. Naomi nodded looking more lost than angry now. Giving her her back Elle started on making her cup of tea. Awkward almost painful silence filled the kitchen, but neither reacted. “Fuck you’re really going to make me do all the work aren’t you,” Elle sighed turning to look at her. Naomi’s eyes flashed up startled, wounded and hurt quickly turning frosty and furious.

“I’m not apologizing to you!” She hissed.

“Well that would have been deeply out of character for you so I’m not surprised,” Elle retorted sweetly. 

“You don’t know me!” Naomi roared furiously.

“No I don’t,” Elle agreed calmly, spearing her with an intense expression, “I don’t know anything about you, but, and here is the rub, you don’t know anything about me either.”

“I don’t want to know you! You mean nothing to me!” She retorted sharply.

“That’s fair,” Elle acknowledged, leaning back against the counter considering Naomi. “I don’t particularly care to know you either, you're kind of an ass, which is nothing new to me, and doesn’t really bother me, but, your brother…your brother means alot to me, and you mean alot to him, so here we are.” Naomi blew out a shaky breath at that, looking like she was fighting tears. “We are both people he loves, and,” Elle shrugged, “I don’t want to make him have to choose between us, I’m willing to work on this,” She said gesturing between the two of them, “For him.”

“There isn’t anything….to work on,” Naomi whispered looking away. “He made his choice,”

“Then why did he wait till the last possible minute yesterday to book a ticket for you? Why did he pick a time as late in the day today as he could? He’s trying to give you a chance here,” Elle told her pointedly. “Look I'm not your favorite person, I’m not a lot of people’s favorite person, but…Milo…is my favorite person, and you are his favorite person. I’ll put up with a ton of bullshit for the people I…love.”  Naomi’s eyes narrowed at that, tilting her head as she took Elle in. She had to stifle a laugh at how similar the movement and Naomi’s facial expression was to Milo’s.

“I…didn’t realize he loved you,” Naomi mumbled, “It’s a lot seeing him with someone,”

“I can imagine,” Elle agreed. 

“And you guys don’t make it easy,” Naomi added, Elle sagely nodded. “I...am not sorry, but…I don’t want to hurt my brother,” She concluded.

“I don’t want to hurt him either, so where do we go from here?” Elle asked her.

“He’s…all I have,” Naomi ground out, looking away tears sliding down her cheeks. “My other brothers and I aren’t close, and…Nadia is…Nadia, it’s always just been me and him against the world. He’s always been there for me, always had my best interests at heart, always put me first, and now…” She let her sentence trail.

“Now you feel like he’s forgotten all about you because of this slutty bitch who couldn’t possibly be good enough for him anyways?” Elle supplied. Naomi looked up at her, jaw clenched before she nodded her head. 

“I’ve always come and gone as I pleased from wherever he is, it’s always been an open door. I…don’t have a dad, my relationship with my mom…but I’ve always had Milo, and you…took him away from me,” She hissed at Elle, her voice choked, “And I hate you,” 

“That’s fair, I’d hate me too.” Elle agreed, “I mean especially if you feel like I’m taking him away from you, which to be clear…I’m not.” Naomi blew out an angry breath and rolled her eyes at that.

“Yeah okay,” She growled, “Then why haven’t I spent a single solitary minute with him since I got here?”

“I mean I’m no expert, but I feel like it’s because you’ve been painfully hostile to his girlfriend every chance you’ve gotten, and…you haven’t really asked to spend any time alone with him?” Elle offered.

“I’ve never had to ask him for his time before!” Naomi raged. Elle nodded.

“He’s never really had a girlfriend before either,” She said softly, “He’s new to having to balance his time, but this is Milo we’re talking about, the single most giving, kind, compassionate man on the planet. If you asked him for his time, he would absolutely give it to you,” 

“Yeah unless you wanted his time too,” Naomi spat.

“Well fortunately for you I am also a really giving, kind, compassionate person, and I would never knowingly get in the way of your time with your brother,” She told her evenly. “Look I’m not close with my siblings at all, they are each other’s best friends, I’m the only girl, and I’m…different from them, if I had a sibling that adored me the way your brother does you, I would think it would be worth it to talk to them.”

“Except he hates…me now.” She choked out, her voice breaking over the words.

“He does not hate you,” Elle corrected, “He is upset with you, he is hurt by you, but he does not hate you.”

“He’s never spoken to me like that,” She whispered tears streaming down her face, she sniffled delicately.

“Jesus you even cry pretty,” Elle sighed, Naomi snapped her eyes up at her bemused. “What? Your whole family is just ridiculously gorgeous, you have the kind of face people write poems about, it’s a little disconcerting to be honest.”

“You should see Nadia,” She told her shrugging, “Bone structure for days,”

“Why is that everyone’s go to in your family, when getting a compliment? ‘You should see James’ , “You should see Nadia’, ‘You should see our third cousin twice removed whose face is so beautiful it would blind you,’ just take the fucking compliment,” Elle hissed. Naomi chuckled, then caught herself. “Ophh I made you laugh, and your face didn’t break!”

“I don’t like you,” Naomi told her firmly.

“Yet, I’m like a fungus, I’ll grow on you,” She told her smiling, “Or not, but either way, I intend to be around for a while, I really…care about your brother, a lot. I’ve never met anyone like him before, and you are nowhere near enough of a deterrent for me to let him go, so we are just going to have to find a way to get along.” 

“I’m not apologizing,” Naomi said finally. “But…”

“Ohh but!” Elle said excitedly, Naomi rolled her eyes but couldn’t conceal her smile fast enough this time.

“But, I will try to be more civil to you, for Milo.” She conceded.

“Good, and I will go talk to your brother and get him to cancel your ticket,” Elle told her.

“Why do you care if he sends me home?” She asked her, looking at her with significantly less dislike, and much more curiosity. Elle sighed.

“Have you ever seen the way your brother talks about you?” Elle asked her, Naomi shrugged, “It’s like…he’s about to explode with pride, and joy, and just so much love. Why would I want to be the reason that he never looks like that again?”  Naomi blinked in surprise, her lips parted as if she wanted to say something, but the moment passed as she closed her mouth and simply nodded. “I’m going to go wake him up then,” Elle said finally, picking up her mug of Matcha and turning to leave.

“Elle…” Naomi called in a soft tone, Elle turned to look at her over her shoulder, “I…thank you,” She mumbled, Elle smiled at her and shrugged a shoulder in no-big-deal gesture, leaving.

****

Elle climbed back into bed with Milo, curling her small body around his much bigger one, spooning him. She placed her face into the crook of his neck, inhaling his warm comforting scent. He reached one of his hands behind him to cup the side of her face, a soothing deep sound coming from his chest.

“Did I wake you up?” She whispered, he turned to look at her over his shoulder.

“No, I’m still sleeping,” He rasped, “Have to be dreaming you, come here,” He grasped her and pulled her over his shoulder and in front of him, so that she was now facing him. 

“Just love manhandling me,” She laughed, pulling herself closer to him as he wrapped her in his arms, placing his cheek against the top of her head.

“Shh, sleep now,” He commanded, kissing the crown of her head. “Talk later,”

“Umm, about that,” She sighed contentedly, pressing her face into chest, allowing herself a moment to enjoy his presence. “You love me right?” 

“Yes…” He retorted looking down at her now frowning, not sure where this was going.

“Enough to let me emotionally blackmail you just a teeny bit for your own good of course?” She asked tilting her head back to look at him, giving him her cutest face.

“Elle…” He started, narrowing his eyes.

“Cancel your sister’s ticket,” She blurted, nipping her bottom lip.

“Fuck,” He groaned, “We talked about this…”

“We did,” She agreed, “And I don’t disagree with your reason for sending her home, or how you did it, or the fact that it’s completely none of my business…but…I’m asking you to cancel her ticket anyways,” 

“Why?” He asked finally,tilting his head as he looked at her, cupping her cheek in his hand, caressing her face gently. She closed her eyes on the sensation.

“We’ve…come to an understanding,” She offered.

“Did she apologize?” He asked her, arching an eyebrow, knowing the answer.

“No,” She told him truthfully.

“Then you know my answer,” He told her. 

“She misses you, she feels like I’ve taken you from her,” She explained.

“Then she should have told me that instead of what she chose to do,” He retorted, though his brows had creased.

“She should have,” Elle agreed, “But she didn’t, and if you send her home now she’s going to end up hating me, you're the one who keeps saying you want to keep me, how is that going to work out do you think?” 

“What are you suggesting I do?” He asked her, searching her face.

“Cancel her ticket, let us…sort our shit out, and you spend more time with your sister, alone.” She told him gently, placing her hands on his chest.

“And if I don’t want to spend time with her?” He asked Elle pointedly, “If I’m still furious at her?”

“Still cancel her ticket and let Naomi and I sort our shit out?” She offered. He sighed. 

“She doesn’t deserve your consideration,” He told her, the corner of his lips pulled up in a crooked smile. “I love you,”  She smiled widely at him, “Fine, I’ll cancel her ticket, but I’m not ready to speak with her yet, and you can tell her that.” He conceded. She nodded her head, they looked at each other for long moments.

“What was your plan if I said no?” he asked her seriously. A wild suggestive smile crossed her face, as she threw one of her legs over his hips, and arched herself against him. “Ah…” He gasped, before laughing. “That’s smart, it would have absolutely worked too!”

“Let’s be honest,” She whispered, tugging his face down for a kiss, “You were always going to give in, long before it came down to me seducing you.”

“Ummm,” He intoned against her lips as he let her take the lead, kissing him slowly, carefully, with such affection his eyes closed, and his body relaxed against her. When her fingers twined into his hair, her nails against his scalp sending shivers down his spine, he groaned in pleasure. “Oh definitely, I’d give you anything you want schatje, all you ever have to do is ask.” He agreed.

****

Milo pulled on a crisp blue button down dress shirt, working the buttons with deft fingers absently as he got ready to start his day. He felt her eyes on his back and turned to her laying in bed still, with a smile.

“Fuck your so sexy it’s ludicrous,” She sighed, he laughed at that. “What are your plans for the day, hot date?”

“With the board,” He replied drolly, “Facetime conference meeting, I am…so excited,” He rolled his eyes. 

“Whelp you can’t spend all your time with your Canadian whore you know,” She teased. He winced, and Elle instantly regretted her words. “Sorry…”

“I don’t like that,” he told her, “You're…everything…it feels gross hearing you say that about yourself.” He shrugged, and Elle felt her chest tighten with feeling. Standing up on the bed, she launched herself at him, and he caught her laughing. 

“You are my favorite, you know that?!” She demanded, kissing his face everywhere she could reach. Her arms wrapped around his neck, as he spun her in a circle. 

“You're my favorite too,” He replied enthusiastically, capturing her lips for a quick kiss, before setting her back on the bed. “What are you going to do while I’m dating 12 old men and…Julian?” 

“Cry about it?” She retorted, making a face, “I’ll find something to entertain myself with,” She assured him.

“Alright, I’ll try and not kill myself,” He sighed, “The realtor got back to me, she can meet with us around 6pm, which means these useless free-loaders are going to have to fend for themselves…again.”

“Which means we are going to spend another fun day cleaning,” She groaned. 

“Aww, you’re my favorite cleaning buddy,” He teased, tapping her nose with a forefinger, his smile died as he gazed at her, a pained frown crossing his face. “Fuck, how on earth did I manage without you?” 

“You managed just fine,” She reminded him, “I just added some…spice.” 

“I…don’t want to manage anymore,” He told her fiercely, “I want your spice, in every part of my life.” He nipped his bottom lip as he said it, his voice barely above a whisper. 

“Seriously, you just have to stop saying things like that to me!” She growled, “I’m going to get so used to it, and I’m going to become insufferably cocky, and then I won’t have any friends, and it’ll just be me, you and Felix 24/7, is that the life you want? Is it?”

“Yes,” He retorted quickly, “Maybe a couple more cats, eventually some children, a dog if you want,” He conceded. She laughed.

“Go away, your 12 boyfriends are going to be so pissed I kept you,” She groused laughingly. He smiled widely at her, framing her face in his hands he kissed her forehead. 

“You go away, you're distracting me,” He told her, picking her up off the bed and setting her on her feet in front of him. He nudged her with his elbow toward the door. “Get out Schatje, let me get dressed and put on my game face, ya?” 

“Frown more,” She told him, “This happy, I’m on top of the world look you have going on, not intimidating at all, very flattering though.” He cupped her cheek in his hand, as he forcibly frowned to a comical level. When she laughed he swept a kiss to her face, pulling her toward him for a quick hug.

“Go,” he groaned, “I’m already completely disinterested in this meeting,”  She held her hands up in surrender, retreating from the room. At the door she turned to look at him once more, her heart in her eyes, looking at him with such feeling his breath caught.

“I don’t want to manage anymore either,” She told him, smiling softly at him, before she walked out the door. He sighed out a hard laughing breath, before tossing himself backward onto his bed, so happy and pleased with his life at the moment he thought he might burst. 

On the other side of the door, Elle leaned back and covered her face with her hands barely restraining herself from giggling like a schoolgirl. She was so happy, so content, so…secure in this moment, she wanted to scream with joy. Instead she composed herself and headed downstairs to the living room to find something to do with herself.

As she descended the stairs she heard the t.v blaring a familiar song…where have I heard this? As she came into view, she saw Naomi alone watching a movie, Elle turned to look at the screen, tilting her head as she tried to place it. When Patrick Swayze walked across the screen she let out a shriek of excitement. Naomi turned to her sharply, startled.

“ROADHOUSE!!” Elle exploded, “I love this movie!!” Naomi’s eyes widened, her head tilted and she got that considering, analyzing, expression on her face that Elle was so familiar with.

“Do…do you want to watch?” Naomi offered awkwardly not making eye contact with her.

“I…do, if that’s okay.” Elle replied carefully.

“Wouldn’t have offered it if it wasn’t,” Naomi said in an undertone, “I…like Patrick Swayze, I…am doing a movie marathon of his movies…if you have nothing else going on…” 

“That really depends,” Elle said thoughtfully, tapping her chin with her forefinger, “Is Dirty Dancing on the list?”  Naomi rolled her eyes at that.

“No, I compiled a list of Patrick Swayze movies and didn’t put the best one on it,” She retorted drolly. 

“Did we just become best friends?” Elle demanded, tucking both fists under her chin, gazing at Naomi from under her eyelashes. 

“Are you going to watch this movie or flirt with me?” Naomi groused, barely catching her telling smile. 

“I am growing on you, like a solid fungus!” Elle muttered under her breath, as she took a seat on the other end of the couch.

“Only because I’m full of shit,” Naomi sighed self-effacingly, and Elle burst out laughing at that, Naomi even openly smiled, though she still wouldn’t look at Elle. See baby, sorting our shit out!

****

Milo frowned as he walked down the stairs, hearing what sounded like his sister and…Elle? Scream singing “I’ve had the time of my life.” badly…very, very, ear bleeding badly. Hurrying down the stairs, he stopped dead as he saw the two of them on the couch, Elle holding the tv remote to Naomi’s face, as she ‘solo’d’, at the end of which they both fell back on the couch in peels of hysterical laughter with Naomi landing on top of Elle. Covering his slack mouth with his hand, he stared in absolute bewilderment at them. Not sure if he should be amused or have himself checked for a concussion. What in the world…?

As if sensing his presence, Elle looked up at him from the couch, around his sister’s head whose entire body was on top of hers.

“Hi baby!” Elle called to him brightly, shoving Naomi’s giggling body off her. Naomi rolled off the couch onto the floor, still laughing,she glanced up, her face bright with joy. All the color left her face when she saw Milo, he frowned, hating that his sister looked at him like that. 

“Hi…” He said carefully, glancing from Naomi to Elle, whose face seemed to get even brighter in his presence. “What are you two up to?” He asked, addressing both of them.

“Movie marathon,” Naomi mumbled, looking at him cautiously. 

“Patrick Swayze,” Elle informed him, smiling up at him. “We are at the best part of Dirty Dancing,”

“The lift,” Milo and Naomi said in unison. Both siblings glanced at each other quickly, Milo helplessly smiled at his sister, she tentatively smiled back.

“It was Naomi’s favorite movie when she was young, she made me watch it so many times,” He told Elle, still looking at his little sister.

“You know he can do the lift right?” Naomi told Elle, after a moment.

“You can not do the lift!” Elle exclaimed. He shrugged, smirking at her.

“He absolutely can,” Naomi rejoined, sitting up on the floor, tucking her long legs under her. “I used to run at him full speed when I was young, and make him do it. I don’t know how many times he got a knee to the face,”

“So many times,” Milo agreed, stifling a laugh at the memory. “Once she mistook Max for me, he uh…did not perform the lift.”

“He did catch me though, right before he hurled me to the ground full force,” Naomi told Elle joviolly, “I can’t say I didn’t deserve it, but I did kick him really hard in the klootzak for it.”

“He was so angry,” Milo said laughingly.

“I’ve never ran so fast in my life,” Naomi agreed, “Hid behind Milo for a week,”

“A month,” Milo amended, “After that no more lift,” 

“You can probably still do it,” Naomi cajoled. He shrugged modestly at that. 

“Show me!” Elle said sweetly, glancing up at him from under her eyelashes, giving him her sweetest smile. “I’ve always wanted to do the lift,” 

“Every girl wants to do the lift,” Naomi said pointedly, jerking her head at her brother in a take-the-hint gesture. He looked from his sister to Elle and laughed.

“Alright, if you must,” He sighed in a dramatic put out fashion, absolutely not meaning it at all. He walked to the end of the living room a little back from the wall. “Okay, so you go to the other end, and just run at me as fast as you can, and then jump I’ll catch you,” 

“As my head goes into the wall,” Elle muttered, sprinting to the opposite end of the living room.

“As if I would ever let that happen to you,” He groused. “Full speed, schatje, and then jump!” Elle nodded her head, and then took off at him, his face already breaking in a huge smile, as she neared him and jumped, he caught her with both hands at her waist and lifted her straight up over his head. “Arch your back,” He instructed, and she instantly complied. “That’s it!”  He said his voice bright with pride. Holding her aloft he turned in a circle, before carefully bringing her back down, she placed both hands on his shoulders as he lowered her. Both of them were laughing as he planted her feet back on the ground. 

“Told you he could do it,” Naomi called from the floor beaming at both of them. 

“Phhff, anyone can lift Elle,” Max scowled leaning against the front door jam watching them. They had been so engrossed in their antics they hadn’t noticed him coming in the door.

“You definitely can’t do the lift,” Naomi told him pointedly, “My ribs still hurt when I take a deep breath,”

“I can do the lift with Elle,” Max insisted, “Here I’ll prove it,” He said as he strode into the living room standing where Milo was. “Run at me Elle,”

“What…no!” Elle hissed, glaring at him.

“What are we doing?” Daire asked, coming in the front door with Maeve, both of them laden down with grocery bags. “Thanks so much for the help dobberhead,” He hissed at his brother in law.

“Max thinks he can do the lift from Dirty Dancing,” Naomi explained, face flushing as she looked at Daire. Elle stifled a knowing grin at that. Someone has a wee crush.

“He can no’ do the lift,” Daire growled dismissively. “Can barely bring in groceries,”

“I can absolutely do the lift! Elle! Run at me!” Max retorted angrily, turning his attention to her. 

“I swear to God if you drop me…” Elle hissed, as she moved to the end of the living room.

“I’ll beat six shades of shit out of you,” Milo finished for her, glaring at his twin. 

“I. CAN. DO. THE. LIFT!!” Max roared, enunciating every word. “Just run and jump at me, Jesus!”  Elle glanced at Milo who looked a bit uncertain and had moved to stand beside his brother to spot in case he dropped her presumably. Sighing, and trusting Milo to catch her if and when Max failed, she ran full speed at Max, nervously biting her lip. As she jumped, Max caught her one handed, right in the belly, holding her up over his head, his arm shook, and Milo moved to stabilize him. “I’ve got her!” Max hissed furiously, glaring at his twin. 

“Don’t drop her!” Milo glowered back. Elle gasped out a breath, and winced as his hand shifted.

“Put her down!” Milo demanded, seeing her wince of pain. “You are hurting her,” Max’s arm shook as he tried to lower her and he almost dropped her, but Milo caught her wrenching her free from his twin, wrapping both arms around her as he set her on the ground. “You fucking oaf,” He hissed.

“I could do that,” Daire commented, leaning against the couch watching them.

“No!” Milo and Elle said in unison.

“Oh come on! You let Max try!” He said looking at Elle.

“And I learned my lesson,” She retorted.

“Fine, Naomi, let's give it a go!” Daire said, turning to Naomi, whose eyes went wide, and panicky.

“Uh, hardly seems fair, I weigh more than Elle,” She muttered awkwardly. Elle had to admit that was pretty fast thinking for an excuse.

“Barely,” Daire retorted dismissively, “Come on, run at me,” He intoned walking over to the spot Max had been in. 

“No, because if you can do the lift with Naomi you’re going to say you're the best at it,” Max hissed. “Naomi, run at me!” He demanded shoving his brother in law over. “I’m your brother! Trust me!”

“I am not doing this!” Naomi threw back at them, crossing her arms furiously.

“Fine! Maeve!” Max called, “Come here love,”

“No, I am no’ participating in this bull shite,” She snapped coming out of the kitchen, presumably having put away the groceries.

“Oh come on! I’m your husband!” Max pleaded.

“Fuck that, I’m you’re twin!” Daire growled.

“Fine, but if either of you drop me…!” She glowered, walking over to the other end of the living room. “What do I do?”

“Run and jump!” Max and Daire told her. She rolled her eyes.

“Don’t do it Maeve,” Naomi intoned, “The only one out of these three who won’t drop you is Milo,” 

“I am not…” Milo began.

“Do it!” Elle hissed under her breath, giving him a wild mischievous look. “Come on, embarrass your brother, lift his wife.” He exchanged a heated look with her, before smirking.

“Fine,” He said, moving to stand in the spot. “Maeve, run at me as fast as you can, and then jump, when I catch you, arch your back, and hold tension in your body. “

“Milo…don’t you drop me!” Maeve warned. He smiled at her.

“I won’t,” He told her confidently, “Just remember to arch your back, your legs are really long, and I don’t want to take a knee to the face,” 

“Okay,” She sighed. Running at her brother-in-law, she jumped as instructed, and Milo caught her around the waist, and hefted her straight up, his jaw clenched as he tilted his head back to avoid colliding with her knee. 

“Arch your back,” He intoned. She did as instructed, lifting her legs behind her in a pretty bow shape. Milo took a step back to counterbalance, Max moved forward to spot, but it was not needed as Milo held her aloft for a few moments, before carefully lowering her to the ground. She whooped exhilarated.

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph, you are so fucking strong!” She cried out, looking at her brother in law in surprise. 

“Hey! I can do that too!” Max grumbled.

“So can I!” Daire seconded. “Let’s go, run at me!”

“Fine, but do no’ do anything stupid, do exactly what Milo just did!” She told both of them, glaring at them each in turn.

“Me first,” Max said.

“I’m her twin!” Daire told him furiously, “I’m going first, blood is thicker than marriage,” 

“Alright,” Max conceded, moving aside to let Daire take his place, he stood beside him ready to spot if needed. 

Elle and Milo exchanged a look and shrugged, moving to join Naomi on the couch. As they sat down, Milo caught Elle around the waist and pulled her to sit between his legs on the couch, wrapping his arms around her as she sat. Elle glanced up at Naomi quickly, and was surprised to find that she didn’t seem fazed at all, not even when Milo swept a kiss along her temple, balancing his chin on her shoulder to watch. In fact Naomi seemed to be trying to stifle a smile.

“Everyone comfortable? Can we start now?” Max asked sarcastically, rolling his eyes. 

“Don’t drop your wife,” Milo called back sweetly. Max gave him the finger, as he turned back to face his wife.

“Alright, come on then Maeve,” Daire said, squatting into his haunches. “Run at me!”  Maeve sighed as she complied, running full force at her brother, jumping exactly as she had last time. Daire caught her expertly, standing up and holding her up over his head, albeit a little wobbly. “Fuck…this is hard!” He groused as he unceremoniously lowered and then dropped Maeve onto her feet. She landed hard on her feet, grumbling. He turned to face Milo eyebrows arched. Milo shrugged at him, and Elle smirked, feeling unreasonably proud of him. She leaned back into him, feeling him wrap her tighter in his arms. 

“Alright mo’ chridhe,” Max smiled at his wife, “Come to me!” She looked less than enthusiastic, and frankly a little afraid as she came charging at her husband. Elle closed her eyes at impact point, genuinely not sure Max could make it, turning her face into Milo’s chest. 

“He did it,” he assured her, whispering in her ear. The contact sent a shiver of lust through her body. She glanced up at him, to see his amused face watching his brother, and she bit her lip as she took her time admiring him. She heard the loud stomping sound as Max put his wife on her feet, and the angry hiss of annoyance from Maeve. But she couldn’t be bothered to look, instead caught up in how bright his eyes looked, and how perfect his teeth were as he howled with laughter. Oh damn…I really am in love with you… His eyes flashed down at her as if he could hear her thoughts, the ghost of his amusement still on his face, as he looked at her. His face softened in front of her eyes, and he furrowed his brows before giving her a heartstopping adoration filled smile. He cupped her cheek and planted a peck on her lips. She smiled into the kiss, feeling giddy.

“He’s not that strong!” Max grumbled irritated, both Milo and Elle looked up at him.

“He is verra strong,” Daire shrugged. “I’ll no’ shy away from it, that was hard, he did no’ even shake!”

“I didn’t shake,” Max groused.

“You shook like a virgin on her wedding night,” Daire hissed at him. 

“Fuck you, I could do the lift with you!” Max growled.

“No’ you can no’, I do no’ want brain damage!” Daire retorted sharply, “Doubt even Milo could do the lift with me!”

“I could do the lift with you,” Milo replied serenely. Elle turned to look at him, mouthing ‘seriously?’ at him. He smiled at her and nodded.

“No you can’t!” Max raged, “There’s no way I could lift Daire, I was just planning to drop him on his ass,”

“Fuck you!” Daire hissed, turning to his brother-in-law incensed.

“If you were stupid enough to let me try then you deserve to be dropped on your suirsach ass.” Max told him reasonably.

“How much do you weigh Daire? 100 kilos?” Milo asked pleasantly, a huge shit eating grin on his face.

“I take offense to that! I’m a svelte 90 thank you!” Daire retorted sharply.

“I can lift you,” Milo reiterated, placing his chin on top of Elle’s head, giving both of them a full view of his grinning taunting face. 

“Fuck you,” Max hissed, “Daire, go run at him!” 

“What?! Absolutely no’!” Daire growled, turning to Max like he was demented.

“He says he can do it, let’s see!” Max replied. “I’m calling his bluff!” 

“At the expense of cracking my skull? I do no’ think so!” Daire said, outraged.

“Didn’t realize you were such a bitch, Daire,” Elle muttered, matching Milo’s grin. “I mean weren’t you just going on about how strong he is, weren’t you pushing Maeve to do the lift a few minutes ago? Didn’t you say…”

“I see what your doing there lass,” Daire cut her off, scrunching his face, “Fuck me, it’s working, fine, let’s do the lift Milo, but if you drop me…”

“You’ll what? Require a ride to the emergency room?” Milo asked, arching an eyebrow at him. He planted a kiss on Elle’s forehead as he disentangled himself from her and walked back to Max. “You need to spot me here, all joking aside I might drop this fat ass,” He told his twin.

“Umnae fat!” Daire raged as he jogged across the living room to the far end. “Okay so what am I supposed to do exactly?”

“Run at me full speed, and then jump when you get to me, you need to hold tension in your body, I can not stress this enough, otherwise you're going over my shoulder head first,” Milo told him seriously. “Arch your back,” 

“Fuck me, this is the stupidest thing I’ve ever done,” He muttered under his breath as he ran at Milo, jumping as he got to him. Milo caught him, teeth gritted muscles working; he threw Daire’s body up, roaring at the effort, counterbalancing by taking a step back. 

“Arch your fucking back you fat fuck!” He hissed, as he balanced him, his arms were bent, and shaking but he had managed to do a decent approximation of the lift on Daire. Elle stared wide eyed and slack jawed, as she watched him hold Daire up, before dropping Daire back down on his feet. The younger man staggered but righted himself, also staring at Milo awestruck.

“What…in the fuck…?” Daire mumbled, jaw dropped. 

“90 Kilos my klootzak,” Milo scoffed, crossing his arms across his chest. 

“Do no’ take this the wrong way, but fuck me I think I caught feelings for you up there! Never felt more like a dainty princess in my life!” Daire commented, covering his mouth as he continued to stare at Milo.

“Is there a right way to take that?” Milo asked uncomfortably, pulling a horrified face.

“He’s spoken for Daire,” Elle called, “I’ll fight you!”

“Please fight for me,” Milo added, turning to look at her, “Now please, I really don’t like the way Daire is looking at me,”

“I’m just saying…” Daire mumbled.

“Yes, yes we all know Milo is the hotter twin, stop drooling over my man!” Elle called, coming off the couch to walk toward them.

“Hey!” Max hissed.

“No she’s right, it’s no’ even a contest,” Daire told him, “I think I need to have a lie in, altered right now,” 

“Help…” Milo mumbled, staring at Elle.

“We should…uh go,” Elle offered, taking Milo’s hand in hers, “Uh we have that…thing in our room that we have to attend to,”

“Yes, the thing,” Milo readily agreed, hurriedly dragging Elle up the stairs as Daire continued to stare after them. 

****

Milo closed the bedroom door behind them, leaning his back into it. He glanced at Elle in front of him, and they both started laughing uncontrollably. They moved toward each other unconsciously, his hands found their way to her waist and hers to his chest. As they calmed together, Elle looked up at his face and felt for a second as if her heart was no longer beating in her chest, as if it were outside of her, and…it didn’t panic her as she felt it should have. Instead she felt safe, warm, and cared for, she opened her mouth to tell him, to say something, anything to make him understand what she was feeling, but before she could he dipped his face to hers and took her mouth in a slow deep soul searing kiss, that rocked her all the way down to her toes.  

Arching onto her tiptoes, she lifted herself closer to him, wrapping her arms around his neck as he wrapped his arms around her waist, molding himself to her, lifting her against him. He raised his big hand up her back, cupping the back of her head and pulled her even closer to him. 

“I can never seem to get close enough to you,” He whispered against her lips, leaning his forehead against hers. “It’s maddening,” She laughed, understanding exactly what he meant. She tilted her face up kissing the tip of his nose, he dropped his face letting her kiss him wherever she wanted as she swept her lips against his cheeks, forehead, and jaw. 

“I…adore you,” She whispered, closing her eyes as she nuzzled her face into his neck. He stilled, before tilting his head away to give her more access. She pressed her lips to his pulse point, and he shivered at the contact.

“Ik hou zoveel van jou” He whispered back, as he cradled her head to him.

“What does that mean?” She asked, pulling back to look at him.

“I love you so much,” He translated for her, frowning. “I fear that when I say it to you in English it creates pressure for you to say it back to me, and…I never want you to feel pressured with me. So…I thought I would start saying it in Dutch instead.” He said sheepishly, looking away. Elle caught his face in her hands and tugged his gaze back to hers.

“No one has ever cared about me the way that you do,” She told him softly. “I don’t want you to have to jump through hoops to be with me, Milo. If you want to tell me you love me, tell me you love me, I…love hearing you say it. The words have never felt true until you.” He frowned at that, caressing her cheek.

“That infuriates me,” He sighed, “How could anyone know you and not love you?” He demanded.

“When…I’m ready to tell you…do you want me to say the words in Dutch or English?” She asked skating over his comment, tilting her head to look at him, nipping her lip. He blinked as if he had never thought about it. Placing a contemplative hand to his face, he glanced at her.

“As loudly as possible, preferably screaming it from the rooftops,” He told her seriously, and she burst out laughing. “I’ll buy you a ladder, and a bullhorn,” 

“We’ll drive around town, stopping at random houses, I’ll climb up the roof and just announce it,” She agreed.

“Scream it,” He corrected, “As loudly and shrilly as you and my sister were singing that song earlier, if I don’t get sued by at least one person for having ruptured their eardrums, I will be very disappointed.” 

“I’ll become a menace for you,” She told him seriously, nipping her lip. “I…would do anything for you, to make you happy.” She whispered absently looking away. 

“Even get along with my brat sister,” He agreed, kissing her cheek, jaw and neck.  “Thank you for that,”

“She’s a good kid,” Elle said, shrugging, “She’s just…hurt. You are her person, she…needs you.” He nodded.

“You are my person,” He told her seriously, “I…can’t tolerate anyone hurting you,” 

“It didn’t hurt,” She promised, “Irritated, enraged, made me want to punch her in the mouth, but I wasn’t hurt,” She assured him, “So now, go forgive your little sister please.”

“This is really important to you?” He asked, bemused by her insistence.

“No, it’s important to you,” She told him truthfully, “and you…are important to me. I know this is complicated and shitty, but I saw the way your face lights up when you talk about her, how you looked just now when you were talking about her childhood…I don’t want to take that away from you, I don’t want to be the reason you can’t have a relationship with your sister. I mean…fuck let her call me a thousand horrible names, but…as long as your face lights up like that…I don’t want to be the reason it stopped.” She mumbled. He looked at her stunned, his face soft and warm and filled with affection.

“You don’t even know what you're saying to me do you?” He whispered, shaking his head as he smiled at her, taking in her beautiful soulful face. “I keep thinking I’m so in love with this woman, and you just open your mouth and make me fall even more in love with you,” He caught his forehead in his hands as if he were trying to find the words to express himself. “You are magnificent, you are incredible, you are…mine,” 

“You only feel that way because I like death metal,” She sighed dramatically, “And I’m the easiest to do the lift with, and when you get cute aggression during the lift you can hurl me right into a dumpster, without straining your back,” She informed him. 

“These are all compelling reasons,” He agreed, searching her face. “Right into the trash with you,” 

“Straight into the ocean,” She added, smiling. He kissed her forehead.

Someone knocked on their door, and they moved apart, glancing at each other confused. 

“I swear if that’s Daire,” Milo mumbled, turning to open the door. Naomi stood outside the room looking nervous. “Hi,” He said.

“Umm….I was wondering,” She began looking wildly uncomfortable, “If Elle wanted to keep watching Patrick Swayze movies…” She mumbled, looking anywhere but at the two of them. Milo’s face softened as he glanced at his sister, he reached out and pulled her into his arms, giving her a warm affectionate hug. She was stiff at first, startled, but immediately sunk into him, burying her face into his shoulder, her whole body relaxing. 

“I’m…so sorry…” She mumbled, her voice shaking.

“Shhh, it’s okay,” He cut her off, “I love you Naem, I’ll always love you, I’ll always have enough love to give you no matter whomever else I love.” She started to cry at his words, and Milo held her, not saying anything else.  Elle brushed past them and left the room, placing her hand on his shoulder and a kiss to his cheek as she left, giving them their privacy. He gazed up at her as she left and mouthed, ‘thank you.’ his eyes shiny with unshed tears. She blew a kiss at him and descended down the stairs.

****

“What are you doing?” She asks, watching him staring out into the lake. Aiden blinks as he turns to her, seeing her walk toward him.

“Lass,” He whispers his face brightening, “I did no’ expect to see you here today,”

“He…left on some errand or…hopefully fell off a cliff,” She mutters under her breath, Aiden snorts at that.

“Into a latrine,” He adds hopefully, she giggles at that.

“Head first,” She agrees. 

“Ah his heads already full of shite,” he sighs, “How long do you have with me?” 

“Not long,” She whispers, taking in his troubled face. “You seemed…off today, I thought maybe…” She lets her sentence trail vaguely embarrassed.

“You thought maybe I’d be in need of your company?” He supplies, she nods. “You were right, I am in dire need of your company,” He smiles, patting the spot beside him in the grass. She comes to him and daintily sits down. He wraps an arm around her shoulder and pulls her close to him, she relaxes into him immediately.

“Aiden, I don’t want to mislead you…” She begins softly, looking away.

“Lass, I’ve no strength to argue with you today,” He sighs, running a tired hand over his face. “Let’s no’ quarrel,”

“Okay,” She whispers, taking in his exhausted mien. “What troubles you?” He blinks looking at her carefully.

“Aileana,” He breathes finally, looking away from her jaw set.

“Your sister?” She asks, confused.

“She is 10 and 5 now, my mother believes it’s time to find her a husband,” he sighs.

“And you disagree?” She asks, tilting her head to look at him.

“Aye I disagree, she’s still a child!” He hisses, “Surely we can wait a year or two more, let her have her girlhood, before she’s expected to become a woman?”

“If you wait too long her prospects will drop,” She says, he turns to glare at her. “I am not saying its right Aiden, I am saying it is the way of things,”

“Old men marrying little girls,” He growls disgustedly, looking away. “Adrian would have wiser counsel than me, he would know exactly what to do.” He mutters under breath after a moment.

“Your brother?” She asks, he nods, spearing her with a sad look.

“I miss him,” He sighs. “It’s so strange, I don’t really think about my father all that often, I miss him too, but it’s not the same as losing a sibling. Adrian was…my best friend.”

“I’m sorry,” She whispers, moving closer to him, leaning her head onto his shoulder. 

“He was such a pain in the arse, always knew the right thing to do, or say in any situation,” He laughs, “Pompous fucker,” 

“Did you look alike?” She asks, softly.

“No’ so much, he looked more like my ma’, except the eyes, his eyes were his own.” He tells her smiling, “Green like purest brightest emerald, lasses loved his eyes, it was a mite annoying, especially with his blonde hair,” He rolls his eyes. 

“Sounds like Ailith,” She says thoughtfully.

“A bit,” he agrees, “But my sister’s hair is darker than his was, his hair would turn almost white in the sun, and he never got a single freckle the arse,” He laughed, “Me I burn, but no’ him, always looked tawny and bronzed, fucking prick,” He says fondly. “He had a mind on him lass, you never met a smarter man, a more put together one, he was kind, and considerate, and wise, he would have made a great Laird,”

“You are all those things too,” She says, frowning. Aiden turns to her, smirking clearly flattered.

“Is that how you see me?” He asks, smiling at her.

“Who doesn’t see you that way?” She teases, and he laughs.

“My sisters, my mother…” He starts listing, “Half the counsel, they call me a hot head,”

“They don’t understand you,” She tells him, “You are…blunt, straight forward, you say what you mean, and you mean it when you say it. You are not a silver tongued lord, you are…an honest and good man.” His eyes widen and then soften at her words, he turns to look at her, the way the sun shines on her high cheekbones, her thick lashes, her full red lips, it hasn’t slipped his notice that in recent days she comes to him without the veil on, though he does not mention it.

“It was never supposed to be me,” he tells her after a long moment, looking away. “He was the heir, and I was the spare,” He laughs, “I got into so much trouble as a lad, and Adrian was always there to bail me out, when he died…I feel a part of me went with him, all the laughter, the fun…I had to become Aiden the Ferocious.” He shrugged.

“And who were you before that?” She asks perceptively.

“Aiden the fuck up,” He laughs, “I was always good for a laugh or prank, or…a tup in the hay,” He says mildly embarrassed. “I can no’ tell you how many times Adrian had to help me sneak out of some poor lass’s barn,” She laughs at that. “I never thought I would have to arrange my sisters’ marriages, or organize anything greater than a battle plan, it was always my job to fight, and probably die,”  Her face blanches at that, his eyes narrow as he takes in her expression. “Does that…bother you, lass?”

“That you feel you were meant to die?” She hisses, eyes flashing. “Of course it bothers me!” He turns his body to fully look at her now, tilting his head to take in her face.

“Why?” He whispers.

“Shut up Aiden,” She growls, pushing a loose tendril of hair from her face. “You know why,” She mutters. He covers his mouth to hide his amusement.

“Oh aye Lass, I ken, but I just want to ken if you understand yourself.” He tells her smugly.

“I thought we weren’t doing this today,” She says sharply, though she can barely keep herself from grinning at his pleased face. He reaches a hand out and cups her cheek, looking at her with such affection she feels her chest tighten.

“Aye, I lied.” He tells her laughingly, searching her face. “I can no’ let you go lass, you ken that, and from the sounds of it…you can no’ let me go either.” She rolls her eyes at him. He drops the hand on her face to her neck, wrapping it around her nape, caressing it.

“Tell me about your father,” She sighs, changing the subject, leaning into his touch.

Laird Circenn?” He asks. She nods, “Oh he was a man among men.” He tells her, his eyes light up with pride.

“They say…you look like him,” She whispers, his eyes dance with amusement.

“If only I acted like him too,” he tells her crinkling his nose, “My da’ had red hair like mine, and green eyes the same shade as Ailith, no’ the same as Adrian though. He was a big man, smart, responsible, kind, and vicious in battle. They called him Circenn the unbreakable,” He laughs at that.  “He was a beast, but at home, with my ma and us,” He shrugs, “Always an embrace, and a laugh, praise…he was a great Laird, but an even better husband and father.” He pauses for a moment, looking sad and lost, “He died protecting me,” He whispers through clenched teeth. “I was down, I should have died that day, but…” He rubs a hand over his mouth, his eyes shiny with unshed tears. “Both of them died that day, Adrian first. My da could no’ stand to lose both his sons on the same night, so instead I lost both of them.”

“I…I am so sorry,” She breathes, taking his face into her hands,caressing his cheek and jaw, he blinks in surprise before he relaxes to her touch. Unhurriedly she moves her face closer to his, brushing her nose against his, slanting her face, she presses a tender kiss to his lips. His eyes widen in shock, but he softly kisses her back. Breaking the contact, she leans back to search his face. “I am sorry they died, but I am not sorry that you lived instead of them,” He smiles sadly at her, gripping her nape with light compressing pressure. 

“Lass, my heart wouldn’t dare have given out before I could present it to you,” He tells her, she laughs at that rolling her eyes.

“Aiden I just finished saying how you weren’t silver tongued,” She chides smiling.

“‘I’m no’ silver tongued,” he tells her seriously, “I mean what I say Lass, remember,” He arches an eyebrow at her.

“What do you think Laird Circenn would have done about your sister?” She asks, side stepping his disconcerting comment. He tilts his head as he considers.

“He would have dared anyone to say his daughter was too old at 10 and 8 for marriage.” He tells her, “But…I’m no’ Circenn.”

“No, you are Aiden the Ferocious,” She tells him pointedly, “If your father could have done this, why not you?” He frowns, dropping his hand from her nape, he steepled his fingers to his mouth as he processes what she was saying.

“I…am Aiden the Ferocious,” He mutters as if he had forgotten, “The MacReith,” She nods in agreement. “I can do as I please, I can decide how and when my sister marries, I’m the one paying her dowry after all,” 

“10 and 8 is not so far from 10 and 5,” She agrees, smiling. “Strategically it makes no difference for anyone who wishes to ally with the MacReith, perhaps you can make this a condition, create an alliance for her marriage now,”

“Betroth her now,” He whispers thoughtfully, “Marriage in a few years,”  She nods. A wide smile crosses his face, as he clasps hers in his hands, drawing her to him, kissing her breathlessly. “Lass, you are brilliant!”

“I hardly think it’s brilliant to remind you of your own name,” She sighs, leaning into his kiss. He laughs against her lips.

“You will make a fine Lady MacReith,” He tells her truthfully, she rolls her eyes at him, trying not to look too pleased with his praise. 

“Do you have anyone in mind for Aileana?” She asks. 

“My mother wants to marry her to the clan MacDuff, but…” He lets his sentence trail.

“But?” She encourages.

“The only suitable match from the Macduff, is Rosen MacDuff. He’s older than I am,” He hisses, “My sister would be his second wife.”

“What happened to the first one?” She asks grimacing.

“Died after having their 5th child in as many years,” He tells her, “tis over my dead body I’ll send my sister to be his breeding mare, I do no’ care how strategically valuable they are, it’s unconscionable.” 

“In order to create an alliance, does the marriage have to be with someone from your direct family?” She asked thoughtfully.

“I suppose no’, what are you thinking?” He asks, watching her carefully.

“Gilda,” She says simply, he blinks in surprise.

“My cousin Gilda? The widow?” He asks, turning to look at her in fascination.

“Yes, she’s eight and twenty, spotty fertility, not that anyone needs to know that,” She shrugged, “Create the alliance with MacDuff, and she’s very unlikely to die giving birth to more of his children, as she’s unlikely to have any more children. And Gilda is beautiful as a bonus.”  His jaw goes slack as he considers what she is saying.

“I…would never have considered Gilda,” he whispers astounded. She shrugs modestly, but he is looking at her with such intense admiration she feels like preening for him. “I wish you had met my brother,” He mutters looking away, “You two would have adored each other, I would have likely as no’ had to fight him for you, I would have won, but still.” 

“Oh yes I’m sure the MacReith brothers would have fist fought over a slave,” She says drolly. “And Laird Circenn would have been cheering you on, no doubt.”

“He would have,” He tells her seriously, “My father believed you fought for what you wanted. But my brother would no’ have those types of feelings for you, he had a lass he loved.” He sighs looking sad now.  “A wee slip of a girl, they were handfasted, before he died, she…could no’ let him go, said life was no’ worth living without him…”

“She…killed herself?” Simrin whispers horror struck, “I can’t…imagine loving someone that much…”

“Aye,” He agrees, “Iona…I pray for her everyday…and the bairn she carried, the last of my brother.” He grits his teeth as he says it, and she flinches. 

“They are together in the next life,” She whispers, staring into the distance.

“You…believe we will live again after this?” He asks furrowing his brow.

“I believe we have lived before, and we will live again,” She explains, “Every lifetime is a chance to learn, and love. Maybe…maybe in the next one I will actually be free.” 

“You could be free in this one,” He tells her seriously, “You could love now…” She turns to look at him sadly, shaking her head no. He clenches his jaw, and looks away. “If it’s true we’ve lived before and we will live again, then…I have found you, and loved you before this, and I will find you and love you again, but lass I am a greedy man, I must have you in every lifetime, even this one.” 

“We have…” She says softly, so quietly he barely catches what she is saying, he turns to her now, narrowing his eyes.

“What?” He asks carefully. She swallows, flashing her eyes sadly to him.

“We have loved each other many, many times before this Jaanu,” She whispers, framing his face in her delicate hands, “And we will love each other many times after this, but…this lifetime…this lifetime is not to be,” 

“Why no’?” He demands. She looks at him with so much sadness, so much anguish and hurt, his heart hurts looking at her. “Tell me lass, explain this to me, why can you no’ love me this time?” 

“One day when we meet again, we will both be free to truly love each other,” She says softly dreamily, “I will see you and I will know you, and you will see me and you will know me, and…I will love you with the intensity and fire of a thousand burning suns, I will hold nothing back, nothing away from you, I will give to you with everything I have to give…but….” She looks away tears trailing down her face, “It’s not this lifetime Aiden, I am sorry.” He captures her face in his hand and turns her to face him, examining her delicate lovely features.

“You mistake me for a weaker and lesser man,” He warns, “I will no’ settle for anything less than having you in every single lifetime I have,” He shrugged. “It will always, always be you lass, and I will waste no’ one lifetime without you.” 

She smiles sadly at him, shaking her head. 

“I will come back for you a thousand times, Aiden.” She whispers softly. “But it’s not to be in this life…”

****

Elle shot up from her nap on the couch all the color drained from her face. Steepling her hands in front of her face, she gasped in breaths. 

I am free to truly love this man…and I promised him I would with the intensity of a thousand burning suns! Oh I am such a stupid bitch! What am I doing?! I’ve been given an opportunity to really truly love this man with everything I have, and I’m NOT taking it?! 

She jumped off the couch, and ran up the stairs to their bedroom, pushing open the door to find him, but he wasn’t in the room. She stormed in, ran to the closet, then the ensuite, then the balcony, fuming, no, no and no. Down the stairs again, into the kitchen, past a startled Max, no! God damn it! Rushing back out, barely hearing anything Max was saying to her, out the front door, running as fast as she could to the library. Checking the pool as she went past, no, she threw open the doors to the library, face bright ready to scream as loudly as she could how she felt…no, not here either.  Chest heaving, Elle stumbled back shutting the doors so loudly it rattled, and ran back to the house, panicked now, she rushed back into the kitchen to Max.

“Where is he?!” She demanded, breathing heavily.

“I was trying to tell you,” He grumbled, taking in her wild disheveled and slightly demented expression. “He’s dropping our mother off at the airport, she’s going back home.” 

“Oh,” She says, blowing out a breath. “Well…um do you know when he’s going to be back?” 

“Why don’t you call him and ask?” Max sighed, taking a sip of his tea. Elle blanched.

“I...don’t have his number…” She mumbled with horrified realization. “I don’t have his number…” She repeated, turning to spear Max with a wild look. “I don’t have my own boyfriend’s fucking number, because that’s how long we’ve been together…” She started hysterically laughing, dropping her face into her hands, the ludicrousness of her situation came to her at that moment, and she doubled over laughing. You're so in love with a guy whose number you don’t even have, you can’t even call him to tell him you love him…cool your jets idiot!

“Did you…want his number?” Max asked bemused, and a little concerned.

“No, I’ll get it from him later,” She managed, shaking her head, walking out of the kitchen. Fucking jackass…let one dream convince me to jump the gun…