FIDGETING on the metal chair, Omron studied the face of the high commander who sat in deep contemplation… or was asleep. In less-than-deep contemplation, Omron wondered why a space fleet with an unlimited budget never requisitioned seat cushions.


The twelve plans outline looked up at them from the digital pad on the silver table. What plans had been tried or were currently in operation? It dizzied him to think his people came in peace to contact humans and have hidden from them for seventy earth years.


A chuckle escaped as Omron considered how those silly earthlings thought the insignia of the fleet, which stood for bravery and peace, looked like earth number fifty-one. And the little green men they envisioned would make his entire squadron roar in laughter, so he could not wait to tell them.

Even his people were surprised, all those hectalectons ago, when they first encountered alien species. On over a hundred known inhabited planets the people looked exactly like them. These earthlings were no exception.


The high commander snorted himself awake. “After Plan 9 failed, we began a controlled introduction of Plan 2.”


“Spies planted in government and scientific positions to prevent them from creating weapons of mass destruction.”


“Good memory, Sergeant.” He pulled a sip of sloshgall from his metal glass.


Omron licked his lips. “They developed the A Bomb before we arrived, it is why we came. Now they have stockpiled nuclear weapons around their planet. Is our plan working, sir?” He hoped his words sounded respectfully inquisitive, not bleeding with the sarcastic thoughts that created them.

The high commander slid the pad to Omron. “This is classified, cleared for your eyes.” The man of impressive reputation and less impressive stature stood, nodded, and sauntered out.

 

Plan 2 Status Report

Earth date: June 1959 to Present

After the failure of Plan 9, the reanimated corpses [zombies] were turned into skeletons. We planted agents with falsified documents in low-level government and scientific positions in the nations with atomic weapons programs. Sergeant Garf led the mission and astutely noted an issue. The following is from his field report:


It was easy enough to blend into society by claiming our limited linguistic abilities and extremely odd accents were because we came from some fictitious country. The Americans accepted that more readily than the British and Russians. But how do we infiltrate government agencies if we do not sound like natives? I submit a full transcript of Officer Jinto on his first [only] day as assistant to the minister of science in the UK.


"Cheerio young chap. I say, I have not seen you hitherto," the minister said.


"Me also is liking the yum American cereal."


Jinto was arrested. Unfortunately for him, we do not age as quickly as humans, so he became a subject of scientific studies and experimentation. We do not know what became of him. We had similar results in the United States, while in Russia our man simply disappeared.


We abandoned government infiltration to concentrate on the scientific communities working on advanced weapons in major countries. This proved easier because they already had the practice of stealing the best minds from other countries, so our agents did not need to speak their languages fluently. Our spies' scientific knowledge quickly gained them trusted positions working on atom and hydrogen bombs and in later nuclear programs.


While an optimistic start, we saw unanticipated results. For example, I submit an abridged transcript of Doctor Neglar from earth year 1994, several years into his work on the North Korea missile program.


"I have do it," Neglar exclaimed. "It sure to outside perform our SCUD items."


The North Korean general smiled at Neglar's schematic. "You have designed our first cruise missile. With your KN-01 we are closer to reaching enemy territory."


"Soon go more far. Next for ballistic missile to going and also next for nuclear."


Neglar spent the following decades advancing their weapons program and became the trusted science minister to the supreme leader of North Korea. He received a commendation when his work allowed that country to reach the US territory called Guam with a nuclear missile. On the positive side, Neglar's Korean has greatly improved.


He was not the only one caught up in the fervor. We had more agents helping the humans develop weapons than thwarting them. In retrospect, we should have foreseen this. We asked scientists to work against scientific progress and suppress their own hubris. Was that hubris on our part? No, we are too brilliant a people to allow something like pride to stand in our way. I humbly submit this was unavoidable.


Plan 2 was terminated.

 

When the high commander returned, Omron wondered if he had watched him and knew exactly when to enter. It was what the American humans called ‘creepy’ because he crept in.


“You see, Sergeant, Plan 2 was sounder and more logical than Plan 9—not a great accomplishment, considering—yet its failure was as colossal. Now the earthlings have improved their weapons and soon will have the capability of destroying all life in the universe, as we anticipated all those lectons ago.”


“Yes sir, the situation is more dire now.” Omron thought deeper. “We left the home world when the humans developed the atom bomb, assuming they would create more devastating weapons and soon discover the solaronite and destroy the universe.”


“We were correct, as we see from their progress over the decades. This is why we are still here.”


“Of course, your excellence, in your infinite wisdom. But sir, is not human advancement due to our involvement? Would they have the capabilities they do if our scientists had not helped them?”


“That brings us to Plan 3.”