After Mark Miller got in touch with her, promising her the relationship she wanted, she had a choice to make. Would she stay with Carl, whom she loved and who she wanted, or Mark, promising her what she thought she wanted?


Jackie knew Mark knew he was married as well, knew all too well what he had done to her. Carl was the man she needed. He had never caused her any pain, or done anything to cause her doubt, or given her a reason not to trust him.


Even after knowing the truth and knowing how she felt, he did care for her and her girls. He could; he just could not give her a relationship. Was a relationship what Jackie wanted? Did she need one to be happy?


That night, Jackie knew what she needed to do. She would talk to Carl first, let him know what was going through her mind, and get his opinion. She always took his opinion into serious consideration because she was his, no matter what.


"Hey, handsome, can you come by tonight?" Jackie hit send on the text to Carl.


"Yeah, everything okay? Or do you need me to dick you down?" Carl sent back.


"You know me so well. HaHaHa, but I do need to talk to you." Jackie hesitated. Did she even want this?


"Yeah, I can come by. Everything alright? You are worrying me." Carl's reply nearly broke her heart.


"It does pertain to us. Can we talk when you come by, please?" Jackie felt tears welling in her eyes.


She really didn't want this, but she thought she needed a relationship, and Carl couldn't give her that.


"Okay, I'll swing by," Carl replied.


Thank God, I cannot do this over text. I am so sorry. Why do I need a relationship? Why can I not be happy as we are? Because you are not good enough, and he will leave eventually.


Jackie broke down and cried. Not ten minutes later, Jackie was outside smoking again, and Carl pulled into her driveway. Jackie's heart jumped.


What? Now? Fuck! I don't even know what I'm going to say. Shit! fuck!!


Carl saw Jackie's wet face, and his face dropped. "Are you okay?" he asked Jackie.


"I don't know, honestly. I-I don't even know if I want to do this. I don't know." Jackie hung her head.


"So, you said it had to do with us. Is it about the relationship aspect again?" Carl knew, but how?


"Yes and no. I know you say you can't, but you have been, and I just don't understand," Jackie replied. "I really don't. We are basically in a relationship, yet you won't or can't give me the status."


"Jackie, it's not that simple. I have to fix myself before anyone gets that status from me," he explained, or tried.


"No, I feel that I am not good enough for the status," Jackie stifled a sob. Carl hugged her, kissed her forehead. Jackie outright cried.


Why the fuck am I doing this?


"Jackie, that is so not true. You are good enough, and I do not deserve you. You deserve someone who can give you what you want," Carl assured her. Jackie sobbed.


"You are what I want."


"That may be true, Jackie," he stated, "but you want a relationship too, and I cannot give you that right now." Jackie continued crying in Carl's chest as he hugged her closer.


Did she really want a relationship so bad that she would give up who she wanted more than anything?


"There is someone who can give you a relationship, isn't there?" Carl said.


"Yes,.. but he.. is not you,.." Jackie said between sobs.


"Are you thinking about being with him?" replied Carl, hugging Jackie even tighter as she grabbed him, crying harder.


"If you want to try a relationship with him, I won't be mad. I can't be mad at you, Jackie. If that is what you think you need to do," he said again.


I am fucking stupid. Why? Why do I need a relationship? I have who I want in my life. Why do I think I need it? Because you aren't worth a relationship to him. Shut up.


"You're wrong, you know," Jackie said as she pulled away just a little to look at Carl. "You do deserve me and everything I have to offer you." Jackie raised and kissed him softly. "Will you still be around if-if I decide to do this?" she asked Carl.


"Of course I will. We're still friends, and I love them girls," he said.


Jackie grimaced and said, "You just don't love me."


Carl pulled her back into his arms. "I care for you so much, but I will not lie to you and tell you something I can't. In time, it may happen, but right now, I can only care for you a lot." Jackie hugged him back just as hard as he was squeezing her.


Do you really want to lose this?


Without warning, before Jackie could do anything, Carl had scooped her up and thrown her over his shoulder, and headed into the house.


"If you do do this and get with this guy, this will be the last time I get to have you, and I am not entirely sure if I like that idea, but just in case, I am loving you one last time," Carl said as he flopped her onto the bed and climbed on top of her.


Carl was both rough and soft. He grabbed her hair and neck. kissing her hard and biting her mouth with his tongue and his other hand roaming down her body, then back up, sliding under her shirt and into her bra, finding her nipples. Jackie moaned into his mouth as he found her hard nipples and pinched one.


Jackie's hands were everywhere on Carl, his hair, under his shirt, drinking in the feeling of his skin, and down his pants, grabbing his ass, pulling his hard cock into her. If this were to be the last time she would have him, it would be both rough and animalistic as well, just like the unbridled love he had always given her. Tonight would be a redo of the first day they made love; it would be the first and possibly last.