A NEW BEGINNING

You can leave,

let time carry everything away.

But when in a foreign world

you listen to the rain at night,

you will hear

my voice whispering through it.

Ela, Vin’s Workshop

It was already deep into the night when Ela finally left Vin’s lab. Her thoughts felt heavy in her head as she wove through the Beacon’s corridors. Vin had been truly startled by her unexpected arrival and even more by her request. But his initially skeptical and dismissive stance shifted the moment Seren decided to step in. Ela knew it was a huge risk to reveal Seren’s existence to Vin, but they had nothing left to lose.

The poor technician had first stared wide-eyed, then yanked off his own meco only to put it right back on, shaken by the sudden realization that before him stood the long-sought ghost in the machine, the entity that had been part of the Beacon’s systems for two decades.

“That explains a lot,” he finally muttered, visibly rattled, and then tried to explain to Ela that he had been tracking subtle system discrepancies for a long time , irregularities caused by Seren’s influence. But he had always felt like he was chasing something that didn’t want to be caught, which had never quite made sense to him until now.

Vin’s initial shock quickly gave way to excitement. Seren won him over almost immediately. The two had much in common, and she knew it. For Seren, it wasn’t hard to convince him to cooperate. Normally Ela might have tried to warn Vin that the flickering presence with the charming smile wasn’t always what it seemed, but right now they needed him too much to risk scaring him off. So she merely watched silently as the two of them launched into a passionate discussion about the complexities of a secret data transfer during Tonot’s synchronization and the secure storage of the extracted files, until Ela suddenly realized she was actually unnecessary here, with no way to contribute to their conversation.

They didn’t need her. And she, on the other hand, had a mission elsewhere. So she took off her meco, which Vin had determined was the best possible carrier for the downloaded data, left it on his worktable, and set off to fulfill the next part of what Tonot had asked of her.

She was surprised at how much time had passed since the Circle meeting ended; it was now the dead of night. The Beacon was silent, but this time she sensed an unspoken threat lurking in the stillness. Something big was coming, though almost no one knew it.

As she passed by the training halls, she heard the muffled sounds of modificant drills. One of the halls was glowing intensely, which suggested that a group was likely undergoing sleep deprivation trials. Ela recalled how Miren had once described what it felt like to go so many days and nights without sleep, only training.

“It’s like someone ripped your brain out of your head. Nothing remains but emptiness, where you get lost. You function like a machine, purely mechanically, without thinking. At the end, you shake, you can’t control yourself anymore, and you feel like if you close your eyes even for a second, you’ll collapse and never get up again.”

Ela hadn’t thought much about it back then. Most modificants passed their physical tests perfectly, their bodies functioning thanks to the many modifications and the chemical support of mobzar. But no one examined their minds. So fragile, so damaged.

But now she had reached the living quarters. The silence here was broken only by the soft breaths of the sleeping modificants. The nightlights by the floor dimly thinned the darkness, letting her orient herself just enough to navigate the space. She stepped carefully until she stood by the third bunk from the right. She knew Reng’s bed was right by the entrance.

She leaned over him for a moment, watching his sleeping face as he breathed. But his sleep was anything but peaceful. She saw the faint twitches across his body, the way his eyes darted frantically beneath his lids, and every so often a sharp breath escaped between his lips. She should have let him sleep. But she couldn’t.

She gently laid a hand on his shoulder, hoping to wake him softly, so no one would notice. But she hadn’t even managed to whisper his name when Reng reacted purely on instinct.

With terrifying speed, he grabbed her by the throat and slammed her hard against the wall. The heavy impact knocked the air from her lungs, and in the dim light, a metallic blade glinted. It was so close to her neck she could feel the cold edge pressing against her skin.

“It’s me!” she tried to shout, but his grip blocked her breath, leaving her only able to gasp desperately, struggling to catch his gaze so he would understand what was happening.

Reng’s eyes glistened in the dim light. He blinked, shook his head, as if trying to chase away something terrible. His grip on her throat loosened, the blade slipped and clattered to the floor.

“Shit,” he whispered in horror.

He staggered, nearly losing his balance, and desperately turned away from her.

“I… I thought you were something else,” he murmured, his whole body trembling as though consumed by a chill he couldn’t control.

Ela slid to the ground, gasping for breath, while around them the other modificants slowly woke, stirred from their dreams by the unexpected noise. She sensed them rising from their beds, trying to figure out what was going on. She quickly pushed down her panic. She couldn’t let the situation spiral out of control.

“It’s all right,” she said with a forced smile, trying to appear calm. “Just a little misunderstanding. I needed to talk to Reng, and I guess I startled him. Bad dream,” she added with a look meant to reassure the onlookers.

Most of them soon retreated back to their beds, but Ela knew curiosity would gnaw at them. She stood, quickly picked up the knife he had dropped before anyone else noticed, and nudged Reng toward the door. Once they were outside, his trembling hands and the way his eyes stayed glued to the floor made it clear just how shaken he was by what he had done.

“I almost killed you,” he whispered guiltily.

Ela considered whether it would help him if she embraced him, but in the end, she simply handed back the knife, which he took silently and slid back into its sheath hidden under his sleeve. The fact that he slept armed was not a good sign. It meant he was possibly slipping into paranoia. She couldn’t miss how he seemed to be on the same downward spiral Miren had been.

“Don’t worry about it, I’m fine,” she lied, trying to hide how much her neck ached where he had gripped it. She had never imagined he had that kind of strength.

“But now I need to talk to you somewhere we can be alone. No witnesses.”

She wasn’t sure where to take Reng where they wouldn’t be seen, so she ultimately chose her own quarters. The door clicked shut behind them, and Ela saw Reng’s eyes scan the small space she had always kept just for herself. She realized that in all her time living at the Beacon, she had never invited anyone here. Reng was the first to breach that one untouched place.

“I know it’s not big, but here I’m sure no one will disturb us.”

To support her words, she locked the door.

“The Beacon sees everything. I don’t know where you get the confidence they’re not watching this room too,” Reng remarked with a trace of bitterness.

“Maybe because I have my sources, and they say this place is safe,” she reassured him, without mentioning that she was relying on information from Seren. Seren, unlike her, had always had a good overview of what was happening inside the Beacon.

“Fine. So why are we here?” he asked, awkwardly finding the only available seat, which ended up being her bed. Her only chair was piled high with books and materials she liked to study in the evenings.

Meanwhile, Ela searched her shelf and pulled out an unopened bottle of anaku, which Vin had given her not too long ago. She had imagined she would open it to celebrate some success, but it seemed she would instead use it to drown her sorrows and failures. She poured one glass for herself and handed another to Reng, who accepted it with a slightly raised eyebrow. She knew he was aware that modificants were forbidden from drinking alcohol. The only drug they were allowed was mobzar and even that no longer applied to Reng these days.

“I got this bottle from a friend,” she said, inhaling the spiced aroma of the anak. “Vin is the lead technician here. A really smart and skilled guy, but the werren kind of keep him under their thumb. Turns out, the guy has no future out there, and inside the Beacon, he has no past… which, it seems, is better for his survival. Even so, it’s left its marks on him, and he constantly drowns it all in booze.”

“And why do they keep you here?” Reng asked with unhidden curiosity right after tasting the alcohol.

Judging by the way he reacted, he had clearly never drunk anything this good before. She wasn’t surprised. Vin had really good connections, and if he was going to become an alcoholic, he was doing it in the best possible style.

“At first I thought I was here voluntarily,” she admitted, pausing for a moment to reflect before continuing, somewhat awkwardly, “but as time went on and the situation became more and more complicated and tangled, I realized everything was different. I probably would have left a long time ago, but at first I didn’t want to abandon Miren. She was my first big failure. Then I fought for you, without realizing that was a lost cause from the start. And finally, I was here to stand by Tonot. That werren had big plans, ones that might have changed our entire world. But it turned out even that was a mistake.

It seems my life is just one big, tragic parade of failures.”

She fell silent and let out a heavy sigh. It was hard to admit, especially when not long ago she had felt like part of something grand and revolutionary.

“Why was it a mistake?” Reng’s voice pulled her from her thoughts.

She looked at him and surprised even herself. Why was she telling him all this? It didn’t matter anymore in their already battered relationship. She had brought him here for something else, but now she found herself studying him closely.

He had changed so much since they grew up together in Karhen Rouz. He had aged, the boundless wonder at life that had always touched her was gone from his eyes. Now there was the weight of knowing that the end could come at any moment. It was the look of someone who had already died once and been brought back. And also the eyes of someone who had been made to relive their nightmares by Nonon over and over, right to the edge of madness.

The memory of the creature lurking in the dark, waiting for the chance to torment and tear a human mind to pieces, made her slightly nauseous. but then she realized Reng had survived it. He was strong, just as Tonot had always claimed when trying to convince her of his hidden potential. She hadn’t believed him, but now she understood the werren had been right.

“It brought me here. To the very end of this chapter,” she answered softly, stepping closer to take the empty glass from his hand. “I’m scared, Reng. I’m scared that maybe this is the last time we’ll see each other.”

“Why?” he asked uncertainly, for the first time meeting her eyes. This time, she saw fear in them. Not fear of what was coming, but fear that her words might be true.

“The Beacon is sending all of you south.”

He smirked. “That can’t surprise you. Everything has been heading that way for a long time.”

“Yes, but it won’t end with the south, believe me. They want more. They’ll keep going, to the sea and maybe even beyond, until the very last one of you still able to fight is standing.”

“They lied to all of us…” Reng said dryly, dropping his gaze back to the floor. “Even that doesn’t surprise me.”

“You have to run,” she blurted suddenly, and it was clear her words really startled him.

“Run?”

“Exactly. As soon as you can, you need to pick yourself up, not look back, and disappear.”

He shook his head, his eyes darting around the room. “You think I haven’t thought about that? Running… running away from all this. But where would I go, Ela? The world out there doesn’t know me. They’ll just see an alter, and you know very well that right now, we’re not exactly popular.”

His voice was tired, but also filled with bitterness.

“And maybe they’re right. I don’t even know what I am anymore,” he admitted.

“To me, you’re still Reng. Maybe a little older, more battered, but also much more experienced.”

He looked into her eyes, and she gave him a sad smile. “Go home. I will too.”

“Even after what’s waiting for you there?” he reminded her of the reasons that had driven her out of the oasis.

She nodded. “Tonot isn’t coming back, and as his mediator, I no longer have any influence here. I’ll be the last of the last. Honestly, I don’t even know what they plan to do with me, and I don’t want to find out. In Karhen Rouz, it can’t be worse than what’s waiting for me here.”

That visibly surprised him. She didn’t blame him. In fact, she envied him a little, unlike her, he was spared the exhausting backstage battles that had drained her so much.

“But I can’t go back,” he reminded her seriously. “I’m afraid they’ve already crossed me off the list. Officially, I’m dead, and even if they chose to ignore that, Noel’s decision still hangs over my head, to make me one of the subjugated.”

She had completely forgotten. So much had changed since she had fled Karhen Rouz.

“I’m sorry,” she admitted, sitting down beside him and gripping his hand tightly. “This is all my fault. I should have stayed back then, listened to my father’s advice. Maybe we wouldn’t have been the perfect couple. You’d be up in the Hills all the time to avoid listening to me, and I’d probably start drinking like most of the women in the oasis. We’d quickly regret it, but after a few years, we’d get used to each other, and in the end, we’d grow old together.”

“You know full well you’re talking nonsense,” he smiled at her for the first time in a long while, and she felt how the atmosphere in her small quarters shifted.

They were now so close and yet so far apart, and it felt strange to both of them. She had always been the one to push their relationship forward, but this time she knew she had no right to. Still, they both sensed they were on the edge of a moment when they might miss each other forever. Ela felt that a single wrong word, and only silence would remain between them.

For several seconds, they just looked at each other, and in his eyes, she saw the reflection of all the years they had shared. Short, secret meetings where they had barely spoken. Somewhere back in Karhen Rouz, where before all the world’s complications, there had been only the two of them.

She wanted to tell him to leave, to run as far away from her as he could, but at the same time, she burned with the need to awaken those tucked-away memories they shared. She hated herself for how much she wanted to let him in again, even as she felt that inside him the same longing battled against the high wall of grievances and pain her actions had built between them.

He leaned slightly toward her, and in that moment, the apology for all the wounds of the past, the nightmares and horrors he had endured because of her, hung on her tongue. She drew a breath, ready to finally confess everything she had never been able to say.

But Reng moved first, and in that instant, she realized no words were required.

The moment he pulled her into his arms, burying his nose in her hair just like he used to, she nearly burst into tears. She feared the moment their lips would meet again, fearing it would bring back the terror that had briefly united them in that dark cell, but here, now, just for a short while, he was truly just Reng again. The lanky, sun-browned boy from Karhen Rouz.

And she let herself fall nostalgically into the deep well of the past, knowing she had nothing to lose, because tomorrow might bring the end of everything. She didn’t think about that. She wanted to live in this moment, so she looked up at his face, so different from the one she remembered. Just moments ago, she had seen only the suffering etched into his storm-grey eyes, but now she found only the way he fully, entirely saw her again, savoring her presence.

She let out a nervous laugh as they both awkwardly fumbled to undress, trying not to interrupt the ritual dance of their bodies.

Reng suddenly hesitated, perhaps realizing that his clothes had been hiding all the horrors the Beacon had inflicted on him. Ela sensed his unease and the unexpected stiffness that spread through his muscles. She only shook her head and silently assured him he had nothing to fear. Not with her.

She slowly undressed him, her fingers accidentally brushing over the implants on his back. She felt the foreign, unnatural thing latched onto his spine like some grotesque parasite, slowly consuming his body. She swallowed hard, but before Reng could read the flicker of hesitation in her, she gave him a gentle push so he fell back onto the bed, and she lay down beside him, letting their bodies tangle together.

She felt every one of his touches, the movement of his lips on her skin. She had been alone for so long and had never thought Reng would be willing, after all they’d been through, to share anything with her beyond his anger at the world. She hadn’t believed that something long buried could so quickly rise up and pull her under again.

But then her thoughts and doubts evaporated.

Because his lips found every spot he had once memorized so well, rediscovering them after all this time. Ela’s eyes filled with tears, her breath caught in her throat as she climaxed, and for a moment, the world sank into a merciful haze.

He pulled her close again, kissed her once more, and as she ran her fingers through his short, dark hair, her head was flooded with happiness from the sheer fact that they were sharing each other again.

She let him in. His body was taut with arousal, and as she traced her fingers over the muscles of his neck, tense under the pressure of desire, she felt as if his very energy was tickling her fingertips. Their dance was now a shared one, in the rhythm of Reng’s slow heartbeat. He savored every moment, gazing intently into her face as if trying to imprint every single detail that made Ela who she was.

Their arms intertwined, his body caught firmly between her thighs. She felt his heartbeat quicken, his breath grow shallower, and when she reached up to cradle his head in her hands, he arched with the final surge of his own release.

She held him tightly, pulling his trembling body close, relishing the warm breath against her neck. Suddenly she felt so alive, so real. Tears of joy ran down her cheeks, soaking into his hair.

For a while, they just lay together. Then she heard his soft voice whisper: “You have no idea how many times I’ve thought about it. That I would run. Leave everything behind and go home. But I always thought it was impossible. They wouldn’t let any of us walk away free.”

Ela waited. She knew that wasn’t all he wanted to say. And then he straightened slightly, looking her directly in the eyes. “But you’re right. There’s nothing left to wait for. Maybe… maybe I should try. If I stay with them, sooner or later I’m dead. The Beacon is hungry for blood, and it’s going to be paid with our lives. Maybe it’s time to change the rules.”

“So you’ll go back?”

He simply nodded, and she clung to him even more tightly. For a while, she just listened to the beating of his heart. Slow, but strong. The heartbeat of someone who had just made a promise and as she knew him, he would keep it, even if it meant risking his own life.