The two of them were clearly soul mates and everyone around them could feel their passion. They were like rabbits, filthy teenagers doing it everywhere getting caught several times. He bought her son a lawn mower and jumped into that bonus father role. He proudly boasted T-shirts declaring “bonus dad”, bought shoes and showed up for all the events. They went on trips, kayaking, danced on a frozen lake. He stole her heart in the most aggressive way. He fit in well with her family and friends, convincing them all how madly in love with her he was. She was perfect for him in every way. He was loyal and dedicated to helping her and making her life easier. He lit a fire inside her she thought had fixed long before.

a little less than a year into it, still in a honey moon phase he surprised her with a beautiful diamond ring, her daughter came in and asked what kind of ring it was and he told her it was a promise rings she was devestaed, she thought for sure he was propping, she felt humiliated. 36 years old, never married, being given a promise ring. He then promised her he was going to ask on their anniversary, reassuring her he wanted to marry her. 2 anniversary’s came and went and no proposal. She finally questioned him and he gas lit her making her feel crazy that she thought he wanted to marry her. Instead of leaving, she convinced herself getting married wasn’t as important to her as being with him after all, if the man she planned to spend the rest of her life with didn’t want to marry her maybe it wasn’t meant to be. She stayed, she believed she didn’t deserve the commitment and didn’t want to trigger any of his trauma from past relationships. Thinking if she just loved him enough he’d change his mind in time.

he did not change his mind, 2.5 years into the relationship they decided to get commitment tattoos and pretend they were married. They called eachother husband and wife but that was as married as they would get. She was so in love she didn’t see how insecure she had become. Convincing herself it was ok to be happy ever never. After all, they were madly in love and he would never do anything to hurt her.