It was just a dream. It was just. a. dream. But if it was just a dream, then why is it lurching in my room, staring at me.

The first time I saw it was in a dream. I was in a green field, the sky was blue, no clouds. The fresh grass reached to my hip and covered the entire field. Nothing in the horizon except a large willow tree. I kept moving through the grass but like if the ground was a treadmill I didn’t get anywhere. I didn’t mind though; the scenery was pleasant, and I had nowhere to go. I looked over at the willow tree again and hid behind it a silhouette. A huge mass, its edges irrelevant, no telling where it started, and the rest of the sky ended. It was black, like a deep hole, as if everything that it touches would fall into an eternal void and never return. The only thing that could escape its nothingness was its gaze. Two white stars were looking back at me, with the body’s darkness in its irises. It started moving towards me, a slithering mass hunching, or hovering its way closer and closer. Dreams mess with time, and before I knew it the thing had moved a hundred meters and was right before me, looking. For years it absorbed my face into its stare. I only noticed it when it was too late, but a tendril approached from it, moving so slowly towards my right eye. It was my left eye that noticed it as the blackness of the creature made it impossible to spot distance in the void before me. I felt a cold sting as it inserted itself between where my eye meets the skin. It went further in, the cold sting going deep into my brain until it hurt. Then it jabbed me three times and warmness surrounded my head and I woke up.


It’s still staring.

Its eyes are more human in my room. In the meadow the eyes were blinding lights, shining rays of agony. But here, its eyes are darker. They’re still pale I think, it’s so hard to see in the dark.


The second time I saw it was in my sleep. I was in a hospital. My belly was swollen, and I was expecting. I was alone in this room, and cold and the medical equipment around me was unreadable, scrambled. I had no energy, collapsed in this bed, but I had a nag, I had to move. Something beyond me touched me, made me nauseous, I had to move. In a small struggle I made my way up from the bed and went to the window. It was closed and outside the window I could see a large playground, filled with kids playing in the sun, and I tried to open it up, let in some warmness, some joy, some laughter. It was locked shut. The sun seemed to stop at the window. I tried smashing it open, but I had no energy, I was growing exhausted. Falling to my knees, holding my hands over my mouth, keeping in the nausea. The pain was growing, overwhelming, I couldn’t breathe. I wanted it to stop, to have never happened. Whatever was in me should stay in there, regress, shrivel up and die. Never have invaded at all. I too could die, if not I would shrivel up. Out of me creeped the darkness. Screaming hatred, it teared itself out and as a lump of bloodied meat it lay. I scrambled back as the lump was hidden behind my body and after I had moved, I could see the eyes. No longer the white stars, but calm blue eyes. My eyes, staring back at me, lost in void. They were smiling eyes, wicked eyes.


I can hear it breathing. Hoarse, slow, I can barely hear it but it’s so loud.


The third time I saw it was in a nightmare. Roaring celebration was heard from everywhere. I was in a public bathroom stall, shivering, and nauseous. Something bad would happen. I held myself. I couldn’t keep my body still, every part of me wanted to break free from itself. Another roar deafened my little cries. I heard a door open, and familiar footsteps entered the room. I kept quiet, clutched my face, keeping inn all tears and sound. The steps walked closer and closer to my stall, I lifted my feet, resting them upon the toilet lid where I sat. The steps stopped outside, then quiet. I tried all I could to keep quiet, my heart pounding loud enough to make sound. But the steps walked past the stall. Echoing to the end of the stalls it stopped again. I closed my eyes, wishing that it would just walk away, or never walk again, but it did. Closer and closer, and it stopped in front of mine again. I saw parts of it bend over and look under the door into my stall. Then knocking. Silence. The steps seemed hesitant, and they started backing off a bit, but as another roar came through the foundation of the building the door slammed open revealing the shadow. Familiar eyes, human eyes in its darkness. It sat there in its huge slug mass waiting for something. I was paralyzed, I tried to move, to scream, to puke, to cry but I couldn’t. The only movement I was able to produce was a shivering. The shadow came closer, growing bigger, leaning over me. A tendril approached my shoulder and started holding me down. I started kicking but I couldn’t hit anything. It was as if it wasn’t there my legs hit nothing, flailing frantically until it had my legs in its now appeared mouth and it crushed my right leg, ripping it off and so my leg was gone. In shock I tried to punch something, anything but it removed my left arm, leaving my shoulder and deep into my chest void. I couldn’t even scream before I was lifted and my body slammed into the toilet, snapping something. My left leg was gone by then too, I couldn’t comprehend it, and I didn’t have the time to start either, as it consumed all of me. Gnashing my skull in its enormous mouth. As I fell down a throat I could hear a deafened roar.


Now as my eyes are becoming more accustomed to the dark I can see its form better. Humanoid, no longer a lump. Its coming closer. It stands above me now, leaning down unto me I feel a small cold wet touch on my forehead, asking for forgiveness and giving limerence. The mouth that devoured me now a thin smile.