The rain hasn’t stopped since the machines took control of his breathing. A relentless heavy rain thudding the pavements, which appears to be mimicking my tears. Tears that are flowing endlessly, because I know what is looming just around the corner.


Nothing could have prepared me for this. No amount of rain is capable of washing away what I’m currently drowning in. 


This all started years ago, when I met a monster. That monster is now lying helplessly, in a hospital bed, being fed life saving oxygen through a tube. He’s been in a coma for two days and all I can do is pray that he never wakes up. 

He’s here because of me. 

That gash on the back of his head was me. 

His reason for ending up in a coma? me!

And my grief? That’s for my children. They are possibly about to loose both of their parents, and once the truth comes out they may very well hate us both. 


This man, dying in front of me hasn’t always been this helpless. He spent most of his days enjoying the tournament and emotional torture he relentlessly hurled at me. 

He has hurt and humiliated me in ways you could never dream of. I had decided months ago that I was going to end it one day, I just hadn’t anticipated it ending in quite such a dramatic way. 


And now, I am looking at a murder charge. Because unlike him I wasn’t calculated and premeditated. I was an amature who took her chance and saved us all from his never ending hell.