Elaine had run away from home several times in her teens, and she’d either been returned to her mother by the police, or she’d returned of her own accord. As much as she hated Tracey, and the things she let be done to her, it wasn’t much easier on the streets as a homeless girl. Predators were everywhere; Elaine had reasoned that it was better to be abused in a warm home, than on the pavements or parks, of whatever town or city she’d made it to. She never left Ainsley with a destination in mind, she just got on a bus, train or hitch-hiked, to wherever, and did what she had to do to survive. Until she was either picked up by the police, or fed up of rummaging through the street bins, to find food.
When she’d turned eighteen, she had been more or less frogmarched to the bank; and instructed to transfer her trust fund balance to a standard current account. Tracey had wanted all of Elaine’s inheritance but by now, Elaine was beginning to wizen up to her mother’s cunningness and manipulation. She’d already decided that she’d give her mother some of the money her grandparents had left for her, just so that she could leave Ainsley, and hopefully never see the hard faced bitch, again. And that’s what she’d done.
Elaine had spent some time in most of the major cities in England, as well Cardiff and Edinburgh. She had tried to enrol in several colleges, but was too restless to stay in one location long enough to complete any of the courses she had signed up for. In the end she’d used her experience in the only industry she’d worked in, and had sold her body - her biggest and most valuable asset - as an escort. The depravity that she’d suffered as a child, had left her mentally scared and traumatised, yet she was now willingly giving her body to strangers, in exchange for cash. She was no longer skin and bones; she had filled out to be a healthy, curvaceous young lady. Her body and services were not cheap. She was a high class escort, whose customers were wealthy business executives. She wasn’t giving blow jobs or getting smashed in the back seat of saloons; it was posh hotels, and luxury cars if her clients were in a rush. It’s not something Elaine thought she’d do forever but it was all she knew.
Her first husband Sean had been a client. He had fallen in love with her long silky brunette hair, her ample breast, and that special jewel in between her legs. Elaine didn’t see her clients as anything but clients, but she’d had a few that had grown to be obsessed with her. Sean didn’t treat her like she was just a piece of meat, or a sex toy. He was soft, gentle, romantic even, and he didn’t always demand or want sex. He had often paid the going rate, just to sit and chat with her in a bar, or restaurant. Sometimes he’d just take her for a drive. Six months into their casual but regular arrangement, he had confessed to her that he was smitten. He had no partner or kids, owned his own home and business, and he wanted to own Elaine and her assets, too. As her boyfriend. Elaine had been stunned into silence. Sean wasn’t like the weirdos that had made her anxious and scared by their attention in the past. Sean was normal.
Elaine hadn’t answered straight away. In fact she’d kept him waiting for a fortnight, while she mulled over the pros and cons of having a boyfriend like Sean. It would be her first ever relationship. She was twenty years old with a comfortable sum of money, but nowhere to call home. No one to call, hers. After two years of dossing down in hostels or staying at bed and breakfast’s in order to retain her comfortable sum of money, she’d decided to give it a go. She’d accepted Sean’s request to be his girlfriend, quit selling herself to other men, and moved into his apartment in Canary Wharf. It had been like a dream; Elaine had never entertained being in a relationship with a man, due to the abuse she’d suffered as a child. But Sean was unlike any man she’d met before, and she grew to be happy and content with the life he provided for her.
As the owner of a luxury car showroom in central London, he could afford to spoil his trophy girlfriend. He wanted her to look stunning all the time, and he gave her the funds to make that possible. It was all beauty treatments, personal shopper and executive business meetings, where Sean showed her off with pride. Elaine felt as though she was ready and needing, to leave her past behind. She’d told Sean only that she’d been abused, and neglected as a child, but she hadn’t confided in him about the extent of what she’d had to endure, under her mother’s care. She’d simply made it clear that she had no family, and he hadn’t pushed her to tell him more. Elaine felt safe, comfortable and appreciated, living with Sean. He was a hard-working businessman, with important, powerful and rich friends. He’d done his best to introduce her to the wives and girlfriends of those friends, and for the first time in her life, Elaine started to spend time and have fun with other females. It was a life she hadn’t known, or even dreamed of, but she’d absolutely loved it.
When Sean had proposed to her, nine months into their non-transactional relationship, she hadn’t left him hanging for two weeks. She’d said yes, immediately, and she had been thrilled with the rock he’d pushed on to her finger.
It was thinking about and planning their wedding, that motivated Elaine to try to find her father. Sean had encouraged her, and paid for her to submit her DNA to an international database. Six weeks later, she’d been notified of a parental match. Elaine hadn’t expected to find her father at all, let alone so soon. The two virtual strangers had exchanged messages through the app, sharing details about themselves and their lives.
Patrick Morgan was a man in his late sixties, almost thirty years Tracey’s senior. He would’ve been in his forties when he’d impregnated Tracey, as a teenager. It wasn’t a good first impression, and Elaine had felt a stab of empathy for her mother. Maybe Tracey had once been a vulnerable victim, too, and the trauma of her own experience of abuse, had impacted her ability to be a loving, caring, maternal mother. Patrick had apologised to Elaine and admitted that he’d acted improper in the past, and he disapproved of his behaviour back then. He had three other children from his failed marriage; a marriage that had still been in union when he’d unknowingly left his sperm to grow inside of Tracey. He couldn’t recall ever being in Ainsley or nearby, but when Elaine had emailed a photo of Tracey that she’d screenshot from her Facebook account, that had jogged his memory.
Patrick Morgan had been a low level office worker, when Tracey had absconded from her strict, conservative home. She had spent a few months in Brighton. Patrick remembered that she spoke of her Reverend father, but she’d said she was eighteen and just wanting to experience the privilege of freedom, that was denied to her at home. She had been sitting in a pub looking distressed when Patrick had popped in for a pint, before returning home from a day at the office. According to Patrick,Tracey had been very flirtatious. She’d been served alcohol, so he had no reason to assume she was underage. He’d repeated that information several times in an attempt to make him look less pervy, but the fact still remained that he’d had a wife, waiting for him at home.
Sean had set the wedding date for the following valentines, and Elaine had been undecided as to whether she wanted Patrick to attend, much less walk her down the aisle. He’d told her that he couldn’t and wouldn’t, tell his other children about her, in order not to upset them. They had all taken their parents separation and divorce, badly. Patrick was adamant that he and his ex wife had just grown apart, and fallen out of love; he was living on his own, in West Sussex. In the end, Sean had pressured Elaine into inviting her father, and have him give her away for the sake of tradition. Sean had wanted their wedding to be a spectacular event; one that would be spoken about for many years to come. There was no limit to how much it would cost. When Elaine had eventually informed her father that she was getting married, and she’d like it if he would give her away, Patrick had been ecstatic at the invitation, and special request.
“It would be an honour, my princess,” he’d said with a break in his voice, as though he’d been crying. Elaine had rolled her eyes on the other end of the phone, thinking he was a pathetic old man, and that it really was not that big of a deal.
They had made arrangements for Sean and Elaine to visit him, and give him his formal invite and for Sean to ask him if he could marry his daughter. Elaine had laughed at the stupidity because they were already engaged and even if Patrick had not given his permission, she’d still marry her fiance on the date that had been set. Sean was all for tradition and as both of his parents were dead, having been killed in a car accident in Thailand when he’d been at university, he was delighted at the chance of adopting Patrick, as his father, too. “Any part of you, will become a part of me,” Sean had assured her with a look that she’d hated, to observe on his face. The same pitiful, puppy dog face that he pulled whenever he was about to broach the subject that Elaine did her best to avoid.
“No way, Sean. You’ve got Patrick, now. Please don’t push it.” Elaine hated to even think about Tracey.
Having felt sorry for her mother when she’d first become acquainted with Patrick, she’d soon remembered who her grandparents were. They’d looked after her well, until Tracey had caused her to be taken from them. They had played a significant role in her life, right up until they had each passed away. Any sexual deviance practised and performed by Tracey, had been of her own choice. She had no morals, and used everyone as though the world owed her. There was no way Elaine, would be inviting Tracey to her wedding. The two women hadn’t been in contact for over two years, and that’s how Elaine wanted it to remain. It was easier to compartmentalise the horrors of her childhood, if she acted as though Tracey was dead.
The emotional pain, the nightmares and the anguish of those terrible times, would probably stay with Elaine her whole life, but since leaving Ainsley and Tracey behind, she’d discovered a semblance peace, love and genuine happiness. Those things would always be threatened, if Elaine let the woman who had sold her to paedophiles as a child, have any access to her. Sean still wasn’t aware of the full extent of cruelty that Elaine had endured, and she was trying to escape her past, not get reacquainted with it.
Two days before they were due to drive down to West Sussex to see Patrick, he’d suddenly stopped taking her calls. There was no answer when she called his landline or mobile, and that was not like him.
They spoke almost every day, even if it was just a brief exchange of text messages. With Elaine’s concern for Patrick growing, they had driven to his address a day earlier than arranged.
When they’d knocked at Patrick’s front door, a man in his mid thirties had opened the door. Elaine knew from the photos that Patrick had reluctantly sent her by email - after several months of stalling - that the man in front of her was her brother. He seemed to have a flash of recognition, too, but she couldn’t be certain. How would he know who she was?
“Hi. We’ve come to see Patrick. Is he home?” Elaine had asked, her voice sounding weak and meek, from the unexpected presence of her sibling. He’d stepped outside the flat, and into the communal area, pulling the door to, but not completely. Patrick’s son’s eyes had quickly filled with tears and he’d taken a moment to compose himself.
“It pains me to tell you, but my father passed away yesterday. They think it was a heart attack. He’d smoked forty cigarettes a day for 40 years, and his diet consisted of junk food and cheap whisky. The doctor said he probably didn’t feel any pain.” Elaine couldn’t remember what her half brother’s name was; she had two brothers and a sister. Thomas, Trevor Tanya, but Elaine didn’t know if it was Thomas or Trevor, who had just rocked her world. He soon solved that problem for her.
“I’m Trevor, by the way. My mum’s in there. She’s a bit distraught. Even though they’d been divorced for years, they had remained good friends. Mum came over once a week to clean the flat and make sure dad had essentials like bread and milk, but he was lazy, not frail. I would’ve thought he’d have outlived mum.
“She never really got over, the breakdown and termination of their marriage. I don’t want her getting more upset if she sees you, here.” Elaine was aware that Trevor had emphasised the word, you. Shocked into silence at the news of her recently found father, and standing so close to a brother she never knew existed until a few months ago, was too much for Elaine to assimilate. Sean had saved her from having to say anything, in response to Trevor’s words, and introduced himself as an old friend of Patrick’s.
“And this is my fiancee, Elaine. We were just visiting to give him his invitation to our wedding.” Sean was an expert communicator. Nothing really phased him. He was a quick thinker, and didn’t get easily flustered. Unlike Elaine, who had been struck dumb.
Trevor shook Sean’s proffered hand, before turning his attention back to Elaine.
“Naturally, we checked his phone to see if he’d called anyone for help. The only calls made to and from his mobile, were from Elaine. I know that’s you, because he had a picture of you opened on the screen of his ancient PC. The text messages in his phone helped us connect the dots. You’re my sister, and you’d asked our dad to give you away at your wedding.
“Mum is besides herself with grief, and to learn that he had a secret child at the same time, is just too much. I hope you can understand, that.” Trevor had looked imploringly at his no-longer-secret sister and Elaine, who’d finally found her voice, but it was croaky, as she nodded her head as she said, “Yes, of course. We don’t want to cause anyone any more pain. We were worried when he hadn’t answered his phone all day yesterday, so we’d thought we come and check in on him. I am so sorry for your loss, Trevor. I offer my deepest condolences to you, and your family. We won’t keep you. Apologies for just showing up, like this. We didn’t mean to surprise you.”
Elaine could no longer hold back the tears that had pooled her eyes, before spilling down her cheeks. She wiped her face hastily, and turned as if to retreat from Patrick’s flat, and out of the building. Trevor had grabbed her arm, and pulled her in for a hug. The two siblings held each other, weeping quietly for what seemed an age, but was probably ten seconds.
“I’ve got your number, Elaine. We’ll be in touch once we’ve got our head around dad’s death, and his secret life that we knew nothing about. I’m glad I’ve met you, and I’m sure Thomas and Tanya will want to meet you, too.”
Trevor had shook Sean’s hand again, and Sean had retrieved the invitation they’d come to deliver, out of the pocket of his Barbour jacket.
“Our wedding is still a few months away, and you are all invited. Again, we offer our sincere sympathy. I hope your mum will overcome her grief in time. Thank you for taking the time to speak to us. We hope to hear from you, when you’re feeling up to it.” Elaine had hugged her brother again, briefly this time and thanked him for being so understanding. As they got into their car in the car park, directly in front of the main entrance to the building, Elaine had looked up to the first floor, and bowed her head in respect to the woman she could see standing at the window, behind the curtain. By the time Elaine had got into the front passenger seat of Sean’s Porsche Cayenne, and glanced back up to the window, the woman had gone.
Elaine had broken down instantly; crying loudly, her shoulders trembling. As Sean had pulled her into an embrace, holding her tightly and feeling useless in her time of despair, Elaine had asked, “why?”
Sean would later reflect that it was that day, that had changed his relationship with a woman he had adored, and had felt proud to call his better half. He’d spent the next few years, also asking why. Why was Elaine so broken? Why couldn’t Elaine be comforted by anything that he did? Why was Elaine on a mission to self-destruct? Why had he married her?
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